Moving Forward

28. Hand-in-Hand

The screams were so loud when Jimin finished and, although tired, he walked out of the stage elated and satisfied with his performance. He headed backstage just as Taehyung was coming up to start his number.

Taehyung hugged his panting and sweaty friend and told him he did very well. He held him tight and released him so he could rest before the next numbers. Jimin almost skipped back to the dressing lounge. He was so happy.

As Taehyung walked into ARMY's vision, the screaming and chanting resumed. They were calling his name and asking many questions.

"Hello, ARMY!" he greeted them again. "Why don't we give a chance to ARMY up there." He raised his eyes to those sitting in the bleachers, who were too far to be heard. But they had stationed staff there who could relay the questions to the staff manning the large screens.

"Be okay now, Taehyung" were the words that appeared on the screen. ARMY knew. They knew he had been devastated when Jimin remained unconscious.

"I am," he assured them. "I'm okay now, ARMY. Let's not get hurt anymore. And ARMY has been crying too much. Let's stop being sad now that we're together again, okay?"

"Ne!" ARMY shouted as one.

"I'll sing you a new song, ARMY. It's called Hand-in-Hand."

They modified the song that he had originally written, knowing that ARMY would not miss the meaning behind it. They kept the original, and Bang PD-Nim, RM and Suga arranged the music for it. The melody was soothing, moving at a pitch range that matched his voice and building up to a challenging crescendo. He had recorded it and they told him that it was one of his best solos, if not the best. It contained his heart, at a time when it was struggling to keep beating. They talked of putting it into his mixtape, which he could release sometime in the future, when the past would have already lost its sharp edge and would not hurt anyone anymore.

Hand-in-Hand turned out to be a song about BTS and ARMY, of a relationship that began in 2013 and that triumphed over all the hardships of the years.

Hey, where are you going? Take me with you
Let me hold your hand
Just like yesterday, when I was all alone
You came, you believed in me

You stayed, you waited
Until you saw me shine
I never thought I could, but you did
I never believed in me, but you did

Don't let go of my hand
I can't make it without you
My world will be dark without you
Stay and hold my hand

Hand-in-hand let's walk the road together
Me and you, side by side
Let's face the wind together
So we won't get  blown away

Don't let go of my hand
I can't make it without you
My world will be dark without you
Stay and hold my hand

Taehyung began singing the first lines, and soon after Jungkook joined in, followed by Jin. The vocal line stood before ARMY, asking them to stay, because tonight they would need to say goodbye to their younger selves, to BTS.

ARMY's hand didn't belong to them, now that they were older and much-changed. What they would be in the future may not be what ARMY wanted. They would still be true to themselves in their songs, but they would move on from trying to fit in a persona to being who they already were. They didn't know if their relationship with ARMY would survive, or if they would be walking the road ahead alone. But they would take that chance. They owed it to themselves, after all these years, and after all the sacrifices they had made.

It was time to move on, but they honestly didn't want to let go of ARMY, to lose the lights that had surrounded them, protected them and guided them home for so many years. They were afraid to plunge into the darkness again. The choice would be ARMY's. They would remain in their place. This time around, they would be the ones waiting.

Taehyung looked up at ARMY as he sang. He didn't know if this would be the last time he would see them, this large a gathering of lights, but ARMY deserved all that their hearts desired. He would let their hand go if that was what they wanted, even if it broke his own heart.

(I have no arrangement for Hand-in-Hand, so I decided to end this part with Taehyung's Sweet Night, OST from KDrama Itaewon Class. Credits to Sandii for the video above.)