Where You Belong

4

Meredith stumbled up the stairs and into her room, not even stopping to get changed before collapsing on her bed. She sighed with relief, still not sure how she had managed to get home in one piece. Her thirty hour shift had ended up lasting well over forty hours, and she had barely gotten any sleep on call the night before. Add that to the fact that she had worked what ended up being fifty-four hours in a row with only one night of sleep to split them up, and you had one very tired Meredith Grey. It was close to four in the morning now, but she didn't care. She had the next day off and she was going to sleep for as long as she could.

Even in her exhausted state, her thoughts landed briefly on Derek. It had been three days since he picked her, since he told her he loved her too. Two days since he had told her he was getting the divorce. And one day since he had, apologetically, told her the meeting with the lawyer couldn't be scheduled until the next week. And it was only the very earliest hours of Thursday now. Meredith sighed, trying not to be frustrated, trying not to be mad. She should have realized from the beginning that this would take time. It was just, hearing him say those words to her, being told he loved her... And after everything that had happened between them for the past few weeks. She just didn't want to wait any longer.

As much as she tried to make sense of her thoughts, of her feelings about the goings-on of her life, the exhaustion was just too much, and Meredith fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Hours later, when the sun was high up in its daily arc through the sky, Meredith knew consciousness once again. She opened her eyes and blinked several times before rolling onto her back and stretching her aching limbs. Having barely moved for so many hours, she was stiff. As she took in her bearings she wrinkled her nose, realising she had fallen asleep in her clothes, on top of her bed. Shaking her head at what her life had come to, she rolled herself off the bed and up, onto her feet, making a beeline for the bathroom.

Once cleaned up and dressed, she made to head down to the kitchen for some food, but spotted her cell phone laying on the table beside her bed. She picked it up, reading one missed call, and she just knew who it was. Dialling into her voicemail, she held the phone up to her ear.

"Her Mer, it's me," Derek's voice rang out. "I'm sure you're sleeping, but I wanted to let you know. I heard back for the lawyer, and the meeting is scheduled for Tuesday morning. So, yeah, just wanted to let you know. I'm on all day today, but you can give me a call when you wake up. I'll talk to you later."

Meredith smiled despite herself. She knew he was trying. It wasn't his fault it was taking so long. Well, it wasn't his fault this part was taking so long. If he had gotten the divorce right away like he had said, then it would be done by now. But still, she dialled his number, eager to hear his voice. She hadn't spoken to him since the previous morning. The overflow from the train crash was only now starting to die down. It had kept the hospital staff extra busy for days.

Her hope dwindled as the phone rang several times without him picking up. And with each passing ring, her hope dropped even further until his voice mail picked up. She listened to the recorded message and the beep. "Hey Derek, it's me. I got your message. That's good. I guess you're in surgery. I'm up now, for a while at least. I need to get caught up on laundry and get some groceries and stuff, but I'll have my cell with me. Talk to you later. Bye." She hung up, slipping the phone into her pocket so that she would hear it when he called her back.

However, hours later, Meredith lay in bed, trying to get to sleep again. She was still tired, even after sleeping the day away, and she had an early shift the next day. She needed the sleep. But he hadn't called her back. He never called. She rolled onto her back, tilting her head to observe his side of the bed, his very empty side of the bed. She reached her arm over towards the cold linens beneath his pillow and sighed. She didn't want to sleep alone anymore. Rolling onto her side, she scooted her body over to the other side of the bed. But it didn't really help; it didn't make her feel any better. She tossed and turned for some time before finally drifting to sleep.