...
Why?
Yesterday morning, I had this weird thought.
That I can't do shit right.
That I can't achieve what I really wanted.
That my whole existence feels meaningless to me.
That this whole world felt meaningless to me.
Why?
Why am I still alive?
When I shouldn't be.
This whole thing feels unnecessary to me.
It feels pointless to me.
Pointless.
Pointless.
That word feels all too familiar to me now.
Too familiar to the point where it just drives me crazy.
Abandonment is also a word that I can't help but be familiar with.
Someone who I cared about and loved so much just left me on a rainy night.
Never to be seen again.
...
You know...
Now that I mentioned a 'rainy night', I can't help but get reminded of the situation I'm in right now.
I'm in my dorm room.
It's nighttime.
It's raining.
It's a rainy night.
Just like that time.
When somebody abandoned me.
They abandoned me for good.
And they will never come back.
Ever.
Now, I'm reminded of another thing.
All of the love that I'm getting from the people around me feels real.
Too real to be actually real.
It feels fake.
All too fake.
It's all just fake.
They don't care about me.
They don't love me.
Nobody would.
In the end...
They'll just abandon me like that person.
I know.
I should be scared of that.
But I can't help but feel like I should accept that fact.
I'm not afraid for some reason.
I guess it's because it happened once.
I know.
I should be trying to avoid that from happening again.
But I just can't help but not do it.
It'll happen eventually.
There's no point in trying avoid it from happening.
No point.
It's all pointless.
Just pointless.
Pointless.
Pointless.
Pointless.
...
I feel lonely.
But I don't care.
It doesn't matter.
I don't matter.
...
Maybe soon...
I'll go bye-bye.
I'll disappear from this world.
Never to be seen again.
I don't know anymore.
I don't even wanna know anymore.
I don't even wanna say anything anymore.
I don't even wanna do anything anymore.
I don't wanna die.
But I'll end up dying anyway.
Because it's all just pointless in the end.
All of my efforts of being a good person will just be meaningless.
Nothing matters.
...
It's too late for me to think about stuff like this.
It's best if I go to sleep.
I guess I'll go bye-bye.
See you all again.
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DRA/SDRA2 (+Canon DR, Fangans, OCs) But No Despair
RandomYuki Maeda and his brother, Utsuro Maeda got scouted to attend Hope's Peak Academy. They're both definitely gonna get dragged into chaos by their classmates. Please help them. (Non-despair AU woooo!!!) (Some spoilers for both Danganronpa Another and...
