The Malfoy Affair

Blood As Thick As Venom

Renn's Pov

Today is the day.

The day that Snape checks me and the Dark Lord will find out I'm pregnant. To say I was worried would be an understatement of the century. I was scared shitless. Not because I thought the Dark Lord was going to be displeased, I'm sure he was actually going to be quite enamoured by our progress it's just I still couldn't wrap my head around why he needs me to have a baby in the first place. Specifically Lucius' baby.

I've started to have nightmares and they all end the same. With me delivering this baby and the Dark Lord taking it and performing some sort of blood sacrifice and no matter how much I scream in the dream I'm stuck on the bed unable to move or speak. Completely helpless. Just listening to my baby be tortured.

Every night for the past few days I've woken up screaming and sweating. I've even startled Lucius awake with all of my screaming. I feel awful because it doesn't seem like he sleeps much as is.

He comes running in and is relived to find out that it is just me having nightmares. He usually just lingers by the door not really knowing what to say other than telling me that it's normal for pregnant women to have very vivid dreams but the issue is that this feels like more than a dream. It feels so real and it's terrifying.

I don't bother telling Lucius what the nightmares are about because he will probably just think I'm being silly and that they are harmless. Which I really hope they are.

Other than coming running into my room the past few nights Lucius hasn't really said anything to me. He did end up brewing me a potion for my morning sickness which Tippy dropped off to me the next morning before breakfast so now I'm at least able to make it through meals without feeling like puking.

We haven't resumed our lessons. He can hardly even look at me. I don't know if it's out of disgust or guilt.

When he left the bathroom the day I told him I was pregnant I thought he might've had a new found respect for me but I couldn't have been anymore wrong. He has just gotten more cold towards me.

It's embarrassing to admit and kind of shameful but I really miss the sex. Not the physical act itself although that was very addictive. I miss the touch of another person.

The loneliness is eating me alive. My thoughts are becoming unbearable and my mind is entering into a really dark place that I do not wish to be in. I don't feel much of a physical threat at the moment but it's hard for me to keep my mind out of dark places for little light especially with the nightmares.

I was determined to talk to him today though after Snape checks me. I knew he had to be there and I plan on speaking to him when we are finished.

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"So ssshall I expect some pleasant news this morning from from Severus my dear girl ?" The Dark Lord hissed out with a sinister smile.

Honestly for a second his words didn't even register in me as I was trying to catch Lucius' eyes but he just made it his mission to avoid looking in my direction apparently.

I was snapped back to realty by Snape letting out a small cough that sounded like he was clearing his throat but it was obviously to get my attention to focus on the Dark Lord and the situation at hand. He must've seen what I was staring at as his lifted his dark eyebrow at me in a questioning and judgmental manor.