Out of Control (Damien x Reader)

𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚃𝚠𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚢 𝚃𝚠𝚘 - 𝚁𝚎𝚌𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝙵𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝙼𝚎

It had been a week since...the accident.

A dark cloud had been hanging over us, drenching us with a heavy rain. It felt like we were drowning. Damien was never really home anymore. He was normally with Olivia, which was fine. She needed him more that I did. Damien hadn't spoken to me anyways. It was my fault.

Olivia had almost no clue what was going on in our reality, beside the fact that she had to spend her birthday with her mom. Stacy wasn't even around to celebrate anyways. She was alone on her birthday. Olivia was at her mom's all the time now, which I'm sure its confusing for her. One minute, her dad was there, the next...

"Is Dad coming home today?" Olivia asked with innocence in her soft voice. This was a routine for her. She would ask this everyday after her father's disappearance, and she always get the same response.

"Soon, hopefully." I answered with a half smile. Olivia huffed, then recrossing her legs, "Stacy said Dad went crazy." We remained silent for a moment before clearing my throat and turning to Olivia, "Your dad was a little upset, that's all."

"What happened?" She quietly questioned, "What happened to my Dad? Where is he?"

"He was really upset, Olivia." I repeated, "So he went to go get help."

"So is he better? Is he coming home now?"

"Maybe." I shrugged, "I'm not sure-"

"You should know! It's been forever since I've seen him. You should know something."

I sat there with my mouth open for a second before I stood onto my feet. She stared at me, wide-eyed. Her eyes became slightly watery as her mind wandered.

"I'll go see him. And I'll ask." I huffed, trying to smile even though my anxiety was rising in my chest.

"Okay."

My finger tips felt numb as I stared into the abius. The silence was deafening. My leg bounced against the carpeted floor. My anxiety was piled to the ceiling. It smelled like bleach. The nurse would glance up from her computer to check on me. I just needed to get this over with. The door opened, and two men stepped out. One, a doctor, the other...

Damien.

I jumped to my feet, almost breathless. Damien stared at me for a moment, confused. He then turned back to the doctor, "Keep me updated, alright?" The doctor nodded, and Damien left silently.

"Are you here for Mister Brody too?" The doctor asked once Damien had left the waiting room.

"Uh, yes." I sharply replied, "But I can come back if its too late for visitors-"

"He's actually been asking for you since he recovered from the medical coma." The doctor added as we entered the hallway. The building was cold, and had made my finger tips red. It was mostly filled with natural light from the setting sun.

"So, he's finished his medication, so he's no longer loopy from his episode."

"Episode?" I echoed, shocked, "What episode?"

"That coma must've 'released' some memories from his brain. But the meds repressed it, and now he's perfectly fine and gaining motor function."

We then stopped at a small, white door and my hands felt numb again. I shook them slightly to try and get the feeling running again. The doctor grabbed the doorknob and, "For legal and medical reasons, you are being monitored and recorded."

And the door swung open.

"Hey Rockstar!" The man called from the hard bed. Chase smiled brightly, "I'm getting all the visitors today!"

"Yeah." I sighed and rested onto the bed, "I saw Damien leaving."

"So are you guys broken up?" His eyes flashed.

"No," I quickly responded, "We're just not talking right now..."

"Well he tells a different story." Chase shrugged and nestled back into his bed, "But anyways! How's Olivia? Is she alright?"

"She just misses her dad, that's all. She's wondering when you're coming home."

"By the end of the week, hopefully. I'm cleared off my meds and I passed the mental exam yesterday, so."

It got silent again. Chase stared out the window. He seemed peaceful, internally. I sighed and stood.

"I don't blame you, (Y/N)." He announced, then turning back to me, "For what happened. I don't blame you."

"No," I huffed, "That day, I was in the wrong. I clearly crossed a line."

"I don't remember." He replied as he pulled on his fingers, "But I want you to know that I don't blame you."

"Damien does." I scoffed and sat back down, shoving the hair from my face, "We haven't talked since that night. We don't sleep in the same bed anymore. He's gone when I wake up, and asleep when I get home."

"He's scared, (Y/N)." Chase smiled softly, "I almost died, his best friend almost died. He's lost his sister and his wife, and almost me. It's scary to him."

"It was scary for me too." I rolled my eyes and threw my hands up into the air, "But at least I'm trying to communicate that."

"It's not the same for Damien."

I rolled my eyes again and stood, "I should probably get home. Maybe I can beat Damien's tantrum."

When I opened the front door, I could hear noise from the kitchen. I couldn't tell if it was Kenshin or Damien. I slowly peeped my head in. Damien. He made eye contact with me, then blowing air out the side of this head.

"Can we please stop fighting? Please, Damien." I begged softly. I then rested a hand onto his shoulder, "Can we please talk?"

"I can't do this right now. Seriously."

"Well you need to, cause this silence, I can't handle it anymore."

"Chase almost killed himself!" Damien yelled, "He almost died, (Y/N)!"

"I know, and I'm sorry for that. And I've apologized repeatedly!"

"But is that enough?" Damien scoffed, "Is that really enough?"

He silently stared at me, his lips flat and pink. Damien sighed and quickly ran his fingers through his dark hair, "Chase almost died." He whispered, "Too many people have passed around me, and I can't do it again. That feeling..." He took a deep breath and quickly blinked away the tears that were forming in his eyes, "That feeling resurfaced again and I needed a moment to get better."

"That's all you had to say, Damien. Instead of giving me the cold shoulder, you should've said that."

Damien nodded gently before turning around and leaning over the grey stove, "Are you hungry?" He asked in a monotone voice.

Dinner became -once again- a pleasant thing. We'd talk and make jokes. Damien would laugh every now and then. The sparkle started to return in his eyes. They mostly shown when he mentioned Olivia. He spoke as if it were his daughter, like she brought him that much joy. Did he want children? Or did that dream end with his last marriage? I wanted to ask, but something inside me told me not too. I bit my tongue and continued to smile. He's okay.

We're okay.

We spent some time together in the living room, in silence. Not awkward or angry silence. Comfortable silence. Damien read a book while my head rested onto his chest. I listened closely to his heartbeat. It was like a melody. A lullaby. I slowly began to drift asleep, my eyes too heavy to hold open. I sighed happily and spoke dreamily, "I love you."

His heart stopped.