Aurora
This week has been terrible. Mom's birthday was on Tuesday and I couldn't bear to see anyone.
Aunt Nic did keep me company as we visited Mom's grave and I laid some flowers. Lillie's were always her favourite.
I picked out a beautiful bunch and we sat in the cemetry for an hour. Aunt Nic was proud of me I didn't go running like usual, but all I could hear was Logan's voice in my head, 'You just need to find what works best for you, and I don't mean running for hours.'
I know the PT sessions are working for me, I get the same adrenaline I did when running. But I'm toning up more, making my body stronger. I have Logan to thank for that, but right now I mentally thank him for my decision of not letting my mind take over and wanting to go running.
Logan text me saying that his therapist could see me and I went through a wave of emotions. Aunt Nic was there for me for it all. She is such a great person and I'm beyond lucky I have her in my life.
So here I am, sat in James' office, him staring at me while waiting for me to speak. I honestly don't know where to start.
"Tell me what brings you here today Aurora."
His voice is calming to my ears. I take a deep breath before answering.
"I started having PT sessions with Logan and I found out about his injury which ended his career. He mentioned he's been coming to therapy for years and feels it's helped him, so I asked him if there was anyone I could speak to in hopes it could help me."
"What do you need to speak about?"
"Well-"
You can say it Rory. He can help you.
"My parents died in car accident 18 months ago." My hands start shaking as I speak, tears pricking the corners of my eyes.
"I live with my Aunt Nicola now, she is my Mom's sister. I can't get over them not being here anymore." I bring my hand up to my cheeks where I feel the hot tears on my face.
"And then, I caught my boyfriend in bed with another girl so I ended our relationship. He had cheated on me after being together 2 years. I had to deal with losing my parents and my boyfriend, so I took up running to take my mind of it all. The adrenaline I feel when I run makes it all go away."
I continue talking to James until the tears I shed have all dried up. Our conversation was good and he made me question myself more on what I can do for myself and the choices I make are mine and I can decide what happens in my life.
I booked another session with him straight away, feeling like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders immediately after talking about everything I've had to live through for the past couple of years.
Aunt Nic was right, the money Mom and Dad saved was for my future, but that's now. If I need to use a bit of it for my mental health then that's more than ok.
I just wish I had done this sooner.
◇◇◇
I'm grateful Carla gave me the weekend off. I couldn't face work this week with everything and she still said they would cope without me and Gabby working.We will be at the bar anyway but as customers tonight. It's Dean's birthday so we are all heading out.
This morning I woke up feeling like I have a new outlook on life, I know I've only had one therapy session but it felt amazing getting everything off my chest that I've been bottling up for the last 2 years nearly.
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More Than One Night
RomanceAurora Johnson is struggling to find what to do next in life. She is alone after losing her parents and breaking up with her cheating ex, but when she meets Logan, who is emotionally unavailable and only looking for one night of fun, she feels herse...