The cure for my madness

Part 24: Leaving the past behind

After that horrible night I couldn't sleep at all. I was just in my bed turning around from side to side. But all that was on my mind was him, Alex. Luckily Sophie asked me if we could meet up at the mall. Now I wouldn't be alone with all my thoughts. After some shopping we went to the cafe.

-"Dol help me. What do you think I should do?" Said Sophie while I stared at my coffee mug that was filled with coffee that had gone cold a long time ago. I kept hearing Sophie talking about something but I couldn't stop thinking about that party and everything that happened.

-"Dol? Are you listening?" She tried again to make me listen to her.

-"I'm sorry, what did you say?" This time she got my full attention.

-"What should I do about Aaron?"

-"Who?" I was confused who this Aaron guy was. But I probably would have known if I had listened to her.

-"You really haven't listened haven't you."

-"No, I'm sorry. What did you say?"

-"Are you okay Dol? Has something happened?"

I wasn't ready to talk about everything. Especially not to Sophie. I just put on a fake smile and told a lie.

-"No, it's just that I slept horrible last night."

-"You sure it is just that?" Sophie knew me too well. But I just couldn't tell how it was, I really wasn't ready for it at all.

-"Mhm, I'm sure. So who is Aaron then?" She looked suspiciously at me but she knew there was no point asking me again. I would just deny, deny, deny. So she took a deep breath to tell the story all over again.

-"So Aaron is this new guy in my class and I sit next to him in biology. This week he asked me if we could go out to the movies or something."

-"What's the big problem with that? Don't you like him or something?"

-"I do really like him of course but still what about Daniel?"

-"Wait Daniel? The same Daniel you had a crush on since kindergarten?"

-"Yeah that Daniel. Is not like me and Daniel are together or anything but he has said some pretty flirty things to me recently. Maybe he wants us to become something Dol."

I remember what it was like to be 18 and the biggest problem in life was guys. I'm almost 30 and it seems like it's still my biggest problem.

-"I think maybe you should go on that date or whatever with Aaron."

-"Really?" She looked at me and it seemed like I gave her an answer she didn't like at all.

-"Or I don't know how you feel. It's up to you." I muttered, I was a bit frustrated. I had my own stuff to deal with and now when I tried to focus on someone else's problems It just seemed like I couldn't be enough.

-"Are you sure you are okay Dol? You know you can't lie to me."

-"Is just something that has happened I suppose." I started. Sophie looked concerned, waiting to hear what I had to say.

-"You remember I told you that Zoey found out she was pregnant."

-"Yeah, I do."

-"Well at the party I found out it was all a lie. She just lied so I would start talking to her again."

-"She freaking lied about that? Just so you would talk to her again? Wow, she is crazy."

What I was about to say next was such a hurtful thing for me to say. It brought up memories from the night at the party. How my throat burned after I screamed at him. The look on his face when he took all of his sadness and walked away from me and he left me like a shattered glass. I don't know why I wanted him to go so bad when I knew it was hurtful being away from him.