Antara Darah dan Hati: Dream Reality English Translation

Chapter 28 Part 3 "Conversation Between the Knight and the Princess"

POV Karim

The strong night wind made my body, which was standing on the balcony of my house with my arms resting and folded on the balcony handrail shivered, adding strength to the anxiety and fear that was fighting in my inner conciousness in order for them to take control of that place.

My mind is in chaos due to being filled with worries about me who might make the wrong choice in my life because, the life choice that I have to choose and take will be a responsibility that I will continue to bear until I am judged in the afterlife court by my master and creator.

Suddenly, as I was sinking deeper into my thoughts, I felt something warm and soft touch the back of my right hand, then a soft voice called out to me several times, trying to pull my soul consciousness from sinking into the lake of my mind.

"M-mjin lieve , m-mijn lieve , m-mijn lieve z-zwarte r-r idder (d-darling, d-darling, m-my dear b-black k-knight)."

"Eh, yes mevrouw ?" I told him, answering his call after I snapped out of my daydream.

"Y-Your face looks p-pale, y-you must be t-thinking about the c-choice that your father h-had gave to y-you." he said to me haltingly.

"Yes, that's right mevrouw , I don't know what to choose, this is too heavy for me, hhhh...." I answered her question then exhaled all the air that was held in my chest.

Mevrouw Sofia, who was standing beside me, leaned forward and folded her arms on the balcony handrail, standing next me with our eyes staring at the moon and the stars that were shining as well as the bright lights of the buildings and streets that helped illuminate the entire Sucilangkung City.

"Leiden is lijden (to lead means to suffer), and as t-the candidate of a l-leader, you must be w-worried that when you l-lead people, y-your choices that you m-make will seemed wrong in front of t-the eyes of s-some people t-that you'll lead and, m-maybe one of the things t-that scares you is about what c-consequences that y-you'll receive if the people that y-you lead will do bad things to you." she said, I nodded slowly.

"I k-know how it feels to be filled with those f-feelings, but if what y-you imagine happened, y-you don't have to face those bad things alone.

Me, brother Muhamed, Sister Tantri, brother Lodewijk, brothe Ilya, your parents, w-we are all here to deal with those b-bad things with you." she said to me, which made me turn my head so my eyes could see her face that giving me a gentle smile.

"Also, w-we have Allah. Allah will protect u-us in His way from all the evil, c-chaos and tyranny of our enemies and the people who hate us b-because, if He doesn't protect us, I w-won't be here s-standing next to you and you w-won't be here standing next to me now, right?" she asked me, I just kept silent while still looking at her face which still gave a gentle smile.

"The two of us can d-do this together, and I'll try m-my best to always be by your side to assist, guide and help you j-just as what you have d-done to help and guide me until I c-can finally fall in love with t-the only one God that you and all c-creatures in this universe worship." she said, finishing her sentence.

After she said that, my head bowed forward again then, I gave my reply for all the things she had said.

"Yes , mevrouw , thank you but, are these the only two choices that I have? Can I choose to reject the two choices that are now in front of me and spend my days in peace with you?" I asked her then looked back at her face.

"When you first visited me when I was in prison, you said that you wished you weren't a royal, and neither do I mevrouw .

I never expected to be a noble or even one of the candidate to be the successor of the Sucilangkung Sultanate's throne because, apart from being afraid that I would make many wrong decisions for the people that I lead when I led them, I was also afraid that I would experience the same thing as what my father had experienced, failed to protect the rights and interests of the people in this area due to the actions of the greedy and evil people around him who he couldn't control or exterminate and what was worse, I was afraid that I would only become a puppet leader controlled by the people around me and if that happens, how can I give my accountability before Allah in the hereafter and what punishment will Allah give to me if in the end I really become a puppet leader who'll only become the facilitator of those evil and greedy people to smooth out their crimes and injustice?