Now a days almost everyone has something there committed to, weather it's there phones,there jobs ,there spouses,everyone is committed to something
For me it's silver,weather that be the silver jewellery I saw on the girl that walked by or the silver on the razor I used to shave with I love it
Over time the commitment to silver grows it goes from small pieces like from my razor to the small blade of a pencil sharpener to the silver of the kitchen knife,
After a while my commitment slowly changed from the silver blade to the red lines it left to the sting of my jeans rubbing against my thighs even the pain of the shower water trickling my skin
I committed to the art I drew each line representing a thought I had
"Seriously take a shower you stick "
"Why can't you get out of bed?"
"There disappointed in you"
"You shouldn't be here"...I committed to that feeling of emptiness and disappointment
I committed to the red pain covering my skin and the staining my towels
I committed to the hopelessness and despair
I committed to the fact that I couldn't save myself from it
I committed to a lot of things but now looking back seeing how deeply I clung to those feelings I realised that maybe I committed to not but suicide