More Than Anything | Bellarke (ENG)

Chapter 5

Another day at school. As usual, heavy and hopeless. My mother was still at work so I was home alone. I put my backpack down, somewhere to the side, sat on the couch and hid my face in my hands. I sighed heavily and suddenly tears began to gather in my eyes. I didn't even know why. But I let my emotions explode. Once again, I kept everything inside me for too long and just had to release it. No one was around so no one saw or heard me. As per usual.

Believe me, I wanted to talk to someone about it, but I couldn't do it extraordinarily in the world. I lacked courage.

It's always the case that when it seems to me that everything is finally starting to fall into place, a moment later everything collapses. Now it was like that too, and I had enough!

Bellamy tried to keep in touch with me, but he hadn't been to school in the last few days. All in all, it's not surprising, after all, it's Bellamy. He dosen't care about school. He also stopped calling recently. And when it comes to school, I also started to fail. I got bad grades from mathematics and biology. The woman asks us what the lesson is and what the lesson falls on me. This woman really doesn't have a heart.

I started to get really depressed. I needed help... Because it can end really badly for me. I wish it would finally end, really. Perhaps... Is there a very quick way to do this? Perhaps... I'll only have one way out.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of tapping on the door. I quickly wiped away my tears and went to see who had come. It was Murphy.

"Murphy? " I was surprised to see the boy. "And what are you doing here? "

"Can I come in? " He asked. "We need to talk. "

"About what? " I sighed.

"Please, Clarke..." Brunet looked at me. "This is very important. And I'd also like to explain things to you about Bellamy. "

"Oh no... " I entered into his words. "As far as he's concerned, I don't want to talk about him. "

"Clarke, please. You have to hear it. " He insisted. "You'll understand everything when I explain it to you. "

I looked at the boy uncertainly. To let him in or not? All in all... I'd like to know why he screamed on me like that. I would like to know what it is all about.

In response, I just let the boy in.

I led him to the living room and after a while we were already sitting and starting a conversation.

"Well? " I sighed and looked at the boy.

"Let's start with why Bellamy screamed on then. " Began.

"Sure, I'll just interrupt you for a moment. " I interjected and boy looked into my eyes. "- Why didn't he bother to explain it to me himself? He said he wanted to win my sympathy, but lately he seems to have changed his mind because he doesn't call and I think he don't care. Or he just found himself some other naïve girl... "

"Stop it, Clarke. " Murphy interjected. "It's not like that at all. "

"Huh? " I put my hands on my chest.

"Suddenly you started to believe what people say? "

"People are mean. " I replied. "I never believed what they said. I state this from my own experience. "

"Even though you don't think so at all. " Boy guessed what I had already closed to. "Bellamy doesn't know I'm here. Listen... That day Blake.... First of all, he was drunk. And you know how alcohol works. He didn't mean what he said. I know him all too well. " He glanced at me and continued. "Secondly... Well... All this is related to the situation that happens at his home... " He added uncertainly, which caught my attention. "You know... With him it's not too colorful. I shouldn't say that much... Bellamy himself should explain this to you one day, but I do it because he's my friend and I don' want him to completely ruin his life. "Sighed. "I'll partly agree that he can be a pretty good asshole, but that's what life has taught him. No one ever treated him too well... No one ever believed in him or trusted him, and people rejected him and avoided him with a wide arc... "