This Year is My Year

You Idiot

I paced around my trailer, itchy with an unknown feeling. Well, I guess it was known. I wanted to see Y/N again.

The ride home the night before was short, too short. I wanted to talk to her, ask her more about herself. But I was so consumed by my nerves and the high of her indirect compliment, I just put on Metallica and hoped that she didn't mind my silence.

I stopped pacing and considered smoking a joint. No, that would make my racing thoughts worse. I started pacing again.

"Eddie, you're going to wear a hole into the carpet if you don't stop."

I turned to my Uncle Wayne, who was pouring himself a cup of coffee. I gave him a weak smile and walked to the entry of the kitchen.

"What has you all worked up this morning?"

"Nothing," I lied. He peered at me over his cup and rolled his eyes.

"You know I've known you your whole life? And I can tell when you're lying?" I sighed, somewhat relieved I could talk to someone.

"I'm just, uh, well, I guess –"

"Oh, so it's about a girl." I looked at him, my eyes wide. He raised his eyebrows. "Or a boy?"

I laughed and he turned red.

"I just wanted you to know I would be supportive – "

"Yes, it's about a girl." He smiled and sipped his coffee again. He nodded his head, encouraging me to discuss more. "She's, uh, well, she's back in town, and she's exciting to be around, and I turn into a total idiot when I'm around her, and I just want to see her again."

"So go see her again." He said it so simply, like it was the most obvious thing. I gaped at him – surely, he was joking. "Eddie, I really don't understand the problem here. If you like her, and want to see her, just go see her."

"Just go SEE HER?" I guffawed. "Do you hear yourself right now? I told you that she is exciting, and cool, and I become a blubbering dolt around her, and you just want me to go see her?"

"You could make up an excuse to see her. You're the one in your own way right now."

I stared at him. This man was a lunatic.

"What kind of excuse?"

---

I sat in my van outside of the Henderson household. My excuse was going to be that I wanted to see Dustin to discuss Hellfire business. But I knew that Dustin was with Mike and Lucas, celebrating Lucas' game-winning goal from last night. And then hopefully, we'd be able to talk more.

I looked in the rearview mirror, attempting the flatten the wisps of hair on top of my head, and fixing my fringe. I glanced over to the house, my stomach dropping as I noticed Y/N leaning in the doorway. You idiot.

She was beaming, her hair wet from the shower, in her pajama pants and a university t-shirt. She gave me a small wave, and I attempted a smile through my embarrassment. She beckoned me over, and I jolted out of the van.

Once out, I attempted to breathe deeply and calm my nerves. I slowed my pace and attempted my usual saunter over to her. I flashed a smile.

"Ms. Henderson!"

"Edward, it's good to see you." She was smirking as I walked closer. I stopped as soon as I noticed.

"Your hair! It's gone!" I gasped. You idiot. She laughed.

"Not gone, just less of it. Woke up this morning wanting to change it, so just gave it the old chop. Do you like it?" She twirled in the doorway. I did, but I was turning into that blubbering idiot again, so I took too long to respond. "Ah, well, too bad. Already chopped it."