This Year is My Year

Lose Her

Eddie and Y/N were curled up on the couch, giggling into each other's ears, swapping kisses when they thought no one was looking.

Robin was oblivious, staring straight ahead as she watched Halloween for the seventeenth time. I sat straight up in the armchair by the couch, desperately trying to watch Michael Myers kill babysitters. But my eyes kept darting to the two of them, watching them touch each other like they had invented kissing.

I did not understand what Y/N saw in Eddie Munson. Sure, Dustin thought he hung the moon, but Dustin also thinks that the Ghostbusters are cool. Eddie was a burnout, a freak who sold drugs and ran around with girls who'd make the most dubious of characters blush. And he smoked cigarettes – Y/N hated cigarettes, she thought they were so gross.

"Are we rooting for the teenagers or Michael in this moment, Harrington?" Robin looked to me, pulling me out of my thoughts. I turned, flushed, feeling like I had been caught.

"Oh, uh, you never root for the bad guys, Buckley," I tried to play it cool.

"I don't know – these kids kind of suck," Y/N interjected, making Eddie laugh. I tried to smile, but I bristled when Eddie placed his hand on the inside of her thigh. He noticed, his eyes slitting into a glare. I tried to smile, going back to the movie.

"I think bad guys are underrated," he commented, turning to Y/N and smirking. I rolled my eyes – of course he did.

I had known Y/N for years – we met when she was in my sophomore English class. She sat by me, sparkling her smile, and put her hand out for me to shake.

"Y/N Henderson," I smiled, my heart was in my throat. I took her hand.

"Steve Harrington." She grinned and took her hand back.

"You've got great hair, Steve Harrington," she complimented with a wink. My heart caught and we turned to the front, listening to Mr. Kerrigan drone on.

I never made a move – not because I didn't want to, but because she never gave any indication that she was interested in me. She was close to everyone, touching them, flirting with them, making them feel special.

I dated Nancy Wheeler when my years-long crush had faded a bit and was secretly disappointed with how excited Y/N was for me. She loved Nancy, immediately making her feel welcome to our little group. Nancy enjoyed Y/N's company, and I think when she broke up with me, she was more upset that Y/N would choose me in the breakup.

I genuinely loved Dustin, but I would be lying if I didn't also take him under my wing to make Y/N see what kind of person I could be for her. I would relish telling her about the adventures I had taken Dustin on when she called during her travels, hoping that it would spark something and make her want to come home to me.

And when she finally did come home, she went to Eddie. Eddie who had also managed to steal my protégé away, as well. I furrowed my brows at the thought that he had managed to snag both of the Henderson's.

I watched him move to Y/N's collarbone, kissing the bruises he always left after sucking her neck. My body felt white hot with jealousy. Since I had known Y/N, she had never let a boy touch her how Eddie Munson touched her.

I thought back to the night that Dustin called me, furious that Eddie had kept her out so late. I raced over to their house, hoping to help him find her. I was panicked the entire ride over, convinced Eddie had done something to her.

When I saw her with the peonies, fury bloomed in me. I couldn't believe that Eddie Munson, Eddie the Freak Munson, had actually gotten her flowers. My rage grew when I saw the first hickey on her neck, his brand on her soft skin.

I shook my head, trying to pay attention as Jamie Lee Curtis ran from the killer on the screen. My stomach twisted as I heard Y/N gasp from a touch from Eddie. I stood suddenly, and everyone looked to me.

"I've got to go to the bathroom," I quickly exited the living room, wanting to get as far away from them as I could. I closed the door behind me, and sighed deeply, turning the faucet on. I splashed water on my face and took a deep breath in. I looked in the mirror, staring at the black eye Eddie had given me.

I hated that I had waited for him to be distracted before I hit him. It was cowardly, and I knew it, but I wanted to land at least one punch. Eddie's blows were forceful – he knew how to fight. I hated that he knew how to fight, and Y/N was okay with that.

I opened the door to Robin, who was glaring at me. She pushed me back into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. I was surprised by her presence.

"What is your deal, Steve Harrington? I thought you apologized to them today!" she was gesturing wildly, furiously whispering.

"I did!"

"And now you're staring at them, moony-eyed and jealous because of what? The girl who you have never even directly told that you have feelings for likes a boy?"

I looked at her, and she stared at me, incredulous.

"I can't control my feelings, Robin."

"No, but you can control your actions," she was forceful. I looked down at my feet. "You aren't being fair to her. You're going to lose her if you don't get your shit together."

I looked at her, anger flashing. She would choose Eddie over me?

"Even if her and Eddie aren't together forever, she's going to remember how you acted when she found someone," she answered my thoughts without knowing them. I sighed and nodded. She rolled her eyes. "What would you do without me?"

I smiled, and we left the room together. She patted my back, trying to comfort me. I sat back on the armchair, noticing that Eddie intentionally started marking her neck when I came in. I took a breath and made a decision.

I wasn't going to lose, Y/N – I was going to win her over.