After - A Delena Story

19 - Emotions -

We finish eating the carbonara Damon made and he washes the dishes while I go upstairs and shower.

When I'm done I change into a pair of black shorts and my favourite t shirt (Which still somehow has Damon's scent on)

I decide to wait for him to come upstairs instead of going downstairs and pretty much ambushing him.

Soon enough, he walks into the bedroom.

"Hey." He says.
"Hi." I smile and keep reading my book.

He takes his boots,jeans and last T-shirt off before climbing under the sheets next to me.

"We need to talk. And you need to listen." I tell him with a calm voice and put my book on the nightstand.

"Elena..." He groans.

"How do you actually feel about all of this?" I ask with a more serious tone.

"I'm excited. I know you want this and so do I." He answers, clearly lying.

"Yeah, no. You're lying." I say.

"You really want to know?" He asks and I nod.
"I'm terrified. I'm not ready for this. I'll be a terrible father and I honestly don't want this." He says.

This is how he's really felt?
The whole time he's been right by my side, saying he's excited and can't wait...

I feel so bad.
He thinks he'll be a terrible father too, I know he won't, he's going to be the best father ever.

But the worst part.
He doesn't want this.

He doesn't want a baby.

I don't realise tears are starting to form in my eyes, but it's my turn to stay strong, so I push them back and try to comfort him.

"Why are you terrified?" I ask.
"Because I'll be like him, Elena. My father." He says and my heart sinks.

The couple times he spoke of his father he described him as a heartless monster and would then go on to say he's just like him. That they're both heartless monsters.

I'd have to remind him that he's not heartless and definitely not a monster. Sometimes I felt like he'd believed me but others not so much.

"Damon." I whisper and put my hands on his cheeks.

He looks over at me, his expression straight, the only way of seeing emotion would to be looking in his watery eyes.

"You're nothing like him. You'll be nothing like him." I smile but he doesn't seem to believe me.

"How do you know?" He asks, his tone was deep, serious and it sent shivers down my spine, I don't know why, but it did.

"Because I know you. Arguably better than anyone else, and you are nothing like him." I say and a single tear falls down his face.

"You didn't know him. So you can't know..." He starts but I interrupt him, "I don't need to know him. I know you. You're nothing like him, Damon. You're sweet,kind,compassionate and very snarky but you aren't like him."

By the time I finish speaking tears are running down his face.

"I can't let our child grow up how I did, feel like how I did..." He barely finishes his sentence before breaking down.

It breaks my heart to see him like this, I'm not used to it, he always holds in his emotions and has never broke down in front of me.

I wrap my arms around him and pull him into me.
He cries into my chest and I hold him tightly.