Falling for you (Fruk)

12

Everyday I stayed with Arthur, the more I thought about him at night. Anytime he would do anything, I'd watch him with so much love. I realize that he is in the process of finding a wife, but that won't stop how I feel towards him. My adoration and love towards him were more than just platonic. When I decided to write the letter for him, I didn't realize he would actually write back.

The only time I've seen him live up to the rumors people spoke. Was the other day when he talked to that man. He looked so scary doing it, but really attractive at the same time? There was a part of me that wanted to step in that day, but Matthew made sure that I didn't. He saw me try but he held me back and told me that he could take care of himself.

Even if he was able to.... He shouldn't just get himself in situations like that. What if something bad were to happen one day. I don't think I could bare to watch him suffer tragically.

Arthur showed lots of his affection through gestures. I'm sure he doesn't realize what he is doing by telling his maids to leave us alone. He wants to be alone with me.... In a garden? People will start talking and I knew that wasn't good.

I liked men... but I never tried to pursue any one... from fear of being ridiculed. Arthur.... He doesn't realize that the things he does show his affection in some way. I'm not even sure he realizes how he actually feels. I knew for a fact though, I just didn't want things to go so far.

"You know, those flowers were planted last spring" he spoke. I looked at him confused and saw he was pointing to the flowers. He was saying something about the flowers? It was so odd that he still tried to talk to me despite me not knowing anything he is saying. I mean I talk to him in French too.... But I guess I do it without realizing it.

I looked over to him still talking and he had the sweetest smile. I liked him a lot too.... But I need to remember that there can't be anything between us! He was trying to find a wife, and he was a very wealthy person. Word about his affairs would get around very quickly.

"Arthur...." I spoke. I wasn't even sure I was pronouncing his name right honestly. I tried practicing, but I sounded so funny doing it. "What?" He asked. I smiled at him again and felt this wave of butterflies in my stomach. "Nothing... I just wanted to tell you that you are very cute and I'd kiss you if you'd let me" I spoke.

He looked at me very confused and just nodded nervously. "Okay..." he laughed. I laughed at his reaction and thought it was so cute. He was just some clueless person. His face got so red as I smiled at him.

He looked so nervous sitting here that I decided to stand up and walk towards him. A nice song came on and I gestured for him to take my hand. He looked at me confused and I ended up grabbing him and pulling him up to his feet. "Dance with me?" I asked. He looked to me confused and I began to mimic dancing.

"Oh!!!! Are you sure? What if someone sees?" He said. I just ignored trying to figure out what he said. I began to get into dancing position with him and started to lead. He looked down to his feet nervously and I laughed at him. So he was an airhead when it came to dancing. "I'm not very good at this! What are the moves?" He asked.

His face was really red and I continued to just twirl him around the garden. At some point he stopped being so tense and he started to laugh. "Arthur!! Just have some fun!" I smiled at him.

~
When the tune finished, I let go of him. He sat down laughing and began to relax a little more. I knew I shouldn't , but I wanted to write to him again. It wouldn't hurt to write a couple more times. What else am I supposed to do while being here. I can only try and look for my sister so much before she finally pops up somewhere.

I took a seat too and watched as Arthur began to pour himself some more tea. Deep down he was really kind and sweet. I'm sure whoever he decides to marry is going to be one lucky person to be able to have him all to themselves.

I think if he were to get married.... I would support him with all my heart. I just don't think I would be able to stay and watch him. I knew that I had feelings of adoration for him, feelings were definitely an understatement.... But they were feelings for him. If I were to stay that long .... Which I plan to leave eventually... I don't think I could be happy.

I think I'd be too selfish .... I would be upset that he was able to find someone. If that's the case... I would have to find someone too.. but I would not be able to forget him at all.

If he would just stay single for a while longer, maybe I could have him to myself longer than I'm given. I could visit him every day after work and make sure he was doing fine and was being happy like he should.

My dearest Arthur... if only you knew, or could understand half of what I was feeling as I looked at you. Maybe then it would show you that It isn't just unrequited love. You would see that you also have feelings and that these signs off affection you have been giving me haven't been for nothing.