I Choose All of You

Chapter Forty

When I finally made it to the bathroom, I found Devina crying in an opened stall. Makeup was running down her cheeks, and she sobbed violently into her hands.

"Devina! Are you okay? What's wrong," I asked, rushing over to her.

"I can't do this anymore," she choked out.

"Do what anymore?"

"S-stay. I can't s-stay here any longer."

"Do you want to go back to the palace," I rubbed her back.

"I want to go home. I want to see her," Devina started blowing her nose with toilet paper. I watched her, "Who?"

"Kenna. I feel terrible. Since she's left I feel like a piece of me has died. I feel so guilty having fun without her. Everything reminds me of her. Even seeing Kiss of Death. I couldn't help but imagine all of the witty comments she would have made their entire performance," Devina sobbed. "I don't want to be here, if I can't be here with Kenna. It's not worth it."

I didn't know what to say. I knew they were best friends and have been inseparable since coming here, but I had no idea they were this close.

Devina croaked out a quiet, "I love her."

"I know," I calmly said.

"No," Devina stared at me with her glossed over eyes, "I am in love with Kenna. I really, really love her. And it has taken me just now to realize it."

I embraced Devina in a tight hug. I knew that wasn't easy for her to admit, but I was so happy she did. Devina and I sat like that for a while. Embracing each other as she cried into my shoulder.

After she calmed down, I placed my hand on her shoulder, "I think Prince Kalum is getting a car for Jeremiah to leave early. If we hurry, I am sure you can join him."

Devina slowly nodded her head and wiped her tears away.

We left the bathroom and I walked with her to the entrance of the mansion.

"Thank you, Sarah," Devina whispered. "For being so kind and not judging me."

I smiled, "Of course, Devina. That's what friends are for."

We were about to approach the exit when I heard someone whisper my name. I turned over my shoulder and saw a guard dart back behind a small nook.

"Devina, you go on without me. Are you going to be okay," I asked.

Devina gave me a small grin and nodded.

I left her side and made my way toward the whispering. As I walked around the nook, I saw Atlas dressed as a guard.

"Oh my god," I whispered in disbelief.

I embraced him in a tight hug. Atlas momentarily tensed with surprise, then hugged me back. His strong arms let me relax into them. The scent of fresh clothes and soap filled my nose. He's always so clean. I smiled to myself at the memories of me always walking in on him, in a bathrobe.

We pulled away and I quickly glanced around to make sure no one else could see us. Maybe I just haven't seen him in forever, but he somehow looked more attractive. Maybe it's the uniform. Girls really do love a guy in uniform.

Atlas flashed me an excited, white smile, "Well well well. If it isn't the girl who has saved us all. Your letters have been incredibly helpful, Sarah. I can't thank you enough."

"It was my mission after all," I laughed nervously. I rubbed the back of my head, knowing how distracted I've been the last few weeks. The mission has been harder for me to do than I had thought.

"You've been great. I knew you were the perfect choice," Atlas beamed, "Anyways. I just finished listening in on the Queen's meeting. There was a lot of good Intel. I am about to leave and report it to the other leaders. They are waiting for me back at base."

"That's great," I forced.

Atlas studied me then leaned against the wall behind him, "What's wrong? You seem off."

"It's just been a crazy night."

"Have you talked to Leo yet?"

I winced, "Uh, yeah..."

Atlas crossed his arms. His voice was more serious now, "What did he do?"

"He kissed me." Even saying it aloud was insane to me. I've known Leo for what felt like forever. He was my best friend. Sure we'd "flirt" sometimes, but I never thought anything of it. He was like a brother to me. Or at least I thought.

I looked up at Atlas, and saw he had his lips pressed firmly together. He looked deep in thought. His whole body was tense.

After a moment of silence, Atlas finally spoke up.

"Maybe he was just happy to see you," he said it, but it sounded forced. Maybe even a bit wounded. "Your entire family misses you."

I turned away from him, "I miss you guys too, but... I just feel like there's more for me to do here."

I could feel Atlas's stare. He always seems to be studying me. Like at any minute, I was about to combust, and he wanted to be right there to help piece me back together. He was always alert, but me telling him Leo kissed me, seemed to make him lose his footing.

"More to do here," he reiterated my words. Saying them back, so he could fully comprehend them. "Alright. I trust you, but it's going to get dangerous. So take this and keep it hidden."

I turned to face him and watched as he pulled a dagger from his belt. He handed it to me and I felt its weight in my hands. I wrapped my fingers around the cold, black leather handle. The silver blade glinted from the hallway lights.

"What's this for," I asked, running my fingers lightly over the gift.

"Almost forgot this," Atlas unhooked a matching black sheath, from his belt and handed it to me. "It's to keep you safe. I wanted to bring a gift with me, for when you said you'd want to stay here longer." I slid the dagger into the leather, "How'd you know I'd want to stay?"

"Gut feeling, I guess. Although, I admit a part of me was hoping you'd want to come back home," he rubbed the back of his neck with an awkward grin.

I giggled, "Well thank you for the giant knife, but I don't think I'll need this."

"You never know."

Atlas's black hair fell messily over his eyes. It was then I noticed how tired he looked. He watched me carefully, trying to memorize every part of my face.

"It's really nice to see you, Atlas."

 His eyes softened and the corner of his lip twitched upwards, "Likewise. I couldn't miss the chance to see you all dressed up again. Isaiah has taken a real liking to you. I just hope the Princes haven't been too much of a pain."

We both shared a laugh. If only he knew.

Multiple guards started running down the hall, shouting orders to one another. Atlas swiftly pulled me aside and hid me farther into the corner, his chest level with my eyes. He used his body to shield me from view. We stayed silent in the shadows as they passed by.

"I need to go," Atlas said lowly. His warm breath tickled the top of my head.

"Goodbye, Sarah. Stay safe," he whispered. Then in one smooth motion, Atlas gave me a soft kiss on my forehead and disappeared from sight.