Lucky and Unlucky {Dazai x Reader}

Chapter 100: Insecurity

I wake up and sat up. I stared at the ground.

....Why do I all of a sudden feel ashamed of going to work and seeing everyone?

I felt the realization hit me.

No... It's happening again. I'm going back into insecurity consuming me..

No! Why?! I hated this phase I had! I mean now I always only hear those awful thoughts from the back of my head.. but now they're completely back.. now I'm starting to believe there is something wrong with me! That lady was right...

I sighed.

Let's just get today over with..

~Time Skip~
I walked out of my apartment and walked to the agency.

I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around and saw Dazai.

"Good morning!" He smiled.

"Oh, good morning." I said.

We both started walking.

I stared at the ground and noticed someone walking the other direction we were from the corner of my eye.

It was a woman. She had blonde hair and was walking fast.

....Now I'm feeling jealous.. and ashamed. Oh my God I hate this feeling I get!

I moved my eyes back to the ground.

"Y/n?" I heard Dazai say.

"Yes?"

"Are you okay? You look a little down.."

"Oh, I'm just tired because I barely got any sleep last night due to working overtime." I lied while looking at him.

"Oh."

We walked inside the agency.

~Time Skip~
I sat down at my seat and looked at my computer.

I feel so unmotivated... All I wanna do is lock myself in a closet.

I started typing, I couldn't stay focused.

Geez, is it this hard to type the word case?

I sighed and continued typing.

~Time Skip~
I feel like it's just a bunch of words scrambled together... Am I even typing right?

"Y/n." I heard Akiko whisper to me, "Is everything alright?"

"Oh, yeah.. I'm fine." I said.

She nodded and looked at her computer. She sighed and got up. She walked over to her office.

I looked at my computer.

...Great. Now I'm starting to feel jealous of Akiko.

I started typing again. I stopped whenever I started feeling like I was unmotivated again.

...There is something wrong with me. Awfully wrong with me. That lady I bumped into yesterday was definitely right. Is that also why Dazai doesn't share feelings back?

I stared at my desk.

.... He's more into the girls with perfect bodies, isn't he? Goddamnit! What's wrong with me?! Why am I so gross or-

"Y/n!" Kunikida yelled.

I jumped in surprise and looked at him.

"That's the 15th time I called your name." He said.

"O-oh... Sorry. I zoned out." I said.

He sighed, "That's it. Just get a day off work until you feel better. I've noticed you can't stay focused today."