Unexpected Journey || Hoonsuk AU

Chapter 20 : Hope...less

Jihoon was focused on his camera when the door creaked open. The lonely and gloomy room just suddenly feels a bit lit up. Strangely, Hyunsuk feels something sparkling touch his face as he entered the room. After taking off his shoes, Hyunsuk slips in the room slipper and went inside the room.

"Hyung!" Jihoon rises from his bed. Not Hyunsuk's fault to compare him with a big puppy, but he acts like one. Suddenly, Hyuna's words come to his mind.

"I am pretty sure he's into you,"

Hyunsuk shakes his head lightly and pushes that thought away. He moves closer to Jihoon and gave him back the jacket Jihoon borrowed him just now.

"Thank you for this, and for finding Hyuna, and for -" Hyunsuk paused. He doesn't know what should he say anymore.

"Hehe. It was just a small matter, hyung. I am more than happy that I could help you," Jihoon said with a big smile. He take the jacket that was in Hyunsuk's hand.  He looks at it for a few seconds before he put it on the table. He looks at Hyunsuk, his back was turned at Jihoon. He seems busy rummaging his luggage. Maybe looking for exchange clothes for sleeping.  Jihoon looks back at the jacket and then looks at Hyunsuk again.

God, I really wanna hug the jacket. Hyung's scents surely still lingering on it. He thinks to himself. His heart suddenly starts thumping fast in his chest. Sweat formed on his forehead.

Fuck. No. Jihoon you beast stop thinking about nasty stuff of Hyunsuk hyung.

He shook his head, trying to clear up those thoughts. He looks at Hyunsuk again, the latter is still busy with his luggage. The tiny back in front of him made him want to reach out and hold that small frame of Hyunsuk. He looks at his hand. He still remembers how small Hyunsuk is inside his arm. How his small frame fits in here. The warmness of his body, the smell of his soft and comforting cologne, his fragrance of black fluffy hair, and his fair slender neck. He clenches his hands when he remembers Hyunsuk's trembling body just now. He thought it was the end of everything when he sees Hyunsuk almost collapse at the entrance of the hotel.

He blames himself that he took too long time to find Hyuna. Hyunsuk wouldn't be in that state if he arrives earlier. At that exact time, Jihoon noticed how badly he was in love with Hyunsuk. It's not a mere admiration, not something simply infatuation but something really deep. He has been deeply in love with someone he just met. Even though he knows he already has feelings towards the older, he always put the thought aside by thinking it just because of the attached feeling he has towards the latter.

But the moment he sees Hyunsuk in a vulnerable state while he's not by his side, his heart hurt so much that he can't even describe that pain. And he hates that feeling. He wants Hyunsuk to have all happiness this world could offer. He wants to be the one to wipe Hyunsuk's tears when he cried, hold his shoulder when he falls, make him smile when he's sad, and tell him how beautiful the night sky looks under the moonlight. He wants to be by Hyunsuk's side as long as he can.

Even if there's no telling him if he got a chance, even if there's no destiny put them together, Jihoon has pleaded to himself, he will make it happen. If not as Hyunsuk's lover, he wouldn't mind staying as a friend, forever.

He takes glances at the older guy again, he is now ready to leave for the bath. "Hyung," he thought he just mouthed those words, and yet his voice still reaches the older guy. The latter turns around and looks at him.

"What?" He asks. Jihoon looks at him. Scanning the face of a man who holds a dark past yet tries to keep himself strong while he's on a verge of breaking up. There are so many questions roaming inside Jihoon's head. What is hidden behind those thick walls Hyunsuk made? What kind of dark past that he has yet to let go of? Why would he go through so much pain to the point he would break at any second? The answer to this question is right in front of him but who is Jihoon to ask? Did he even have the right to find the answer? Jihoon clenches his hand to a fist on his knees. His eyebrows meet and he makes a crease. How come he feels so useless to the person he loves? He just pleaded to himself to do everything he would to make Hyunsuk happy but why did he feel like he was already lost even without trying? He bit his bottom lips to let go of his frustration. Despite all that questions, the only could Jihoon ask is "Are you okay?"

Hyunsuk looks at him confusedly. "Me? Why wouldn't I be? You should ask about Hyuna,"

"Hyung, I want to know about you. Are you okay?" Jihoon presses his words. Not knowing why, but there's a bit of annoyance in his voice. Yes, he is annoyed, annoyed with Hyunsuk who dares to tell people to worry about others while he is the one that needs to be worried about.

Hyunsuk lowered his head. He let out a heavy sigh. "I am fine. Just, Hyuna decided to return to Korea tomorrow," Hyunsuk said. There's a hint of disappointment in his voice. Jihoon's eyes widened hearing him.

"What?! Did Miss Hyuna return to Korea? Tomorrow?" He almost can't believe what he heard and that he has to repeat it. "Why?" Jihoon asks again after w few seconds of pause. Ain't no way, Miss Hyuna returns to Korea because of what's happened between her and Hyunsuk hyung. Jihoon knows even though Hyuna has that childish side in her, she never put feelings into any of what Hyunsuk's said. She never throws tantrum even if Hyunsuk objects to her opinion, she accepted it with a bright smile and goes with what is told to her happily.

"She said her editor been bugging her since she's been here. She got no choice but to go back tomorrow," Hyunsuk explains while moving his feet to the bathroom.

Not long after, Hyunsuk is coming out, already dressed up in his sleepwear. He moves to his bed, turns off his bedside lamp, and curls himself under the blanket. Facing the wall. There are two adults in the room, but it feels like there's no one there. It's completely silent. Not a comfortable silence. Jihoon turns his head to Hyunsuk. He is just a few feet away from Jihoon but why it feels so far to reach him out? Even though he usually didn't talk much, it feels like Hyunsuk has set up another thick wall that Jihoon thought he could break.

Jihoon is awake to the sounds of birds chirping from the outside. He slowly open his eyes and reached for his phone. 7:15 am was shown on the screen. He stretches his body. As he turned to his side, there was a rare sight in front of his eyes. Hyunsuk is still sleeping soundly in his bed and his face was turned at Jihoon's side. Jihoon's lips make a small smile. "What are you thinking, hyung? Your forehead crease even when you're sleeping." Jihoon said in a soft voice trying not to wake him up. He moves to his side, looking at that stressed face, and massages Hyunsuk's glabella. He stopped when Hyunsuk flinched.

"Ngh... Jae hyung..."