READY FOR LOVE | JENLISA

Chapter 36

Lisa

It's Friday and I'm sitting at my old wooden desk in English class, anxiously toying with the stupid little teddy bear holding a heart in its paws that reads 'I'm sorry' in my hands.

Last night, I decided that it was time to face the music and actually attend class today to see Jennie. Somewhere in my dysfunctional brain, I thought it would be a good idea to show up bearing gifts along with my apology, which lead to a midnight CVS run where I picked up the teddy bear to try to win her over. Thinking about it now, it seems so stupid.

A teddy bear, Lisa, really? How lame can you be? I scold myself. You seriously think a stupid little bear is going to show her that you're sorry?

Feeling stupid and pathetic, I rise from my chair, ready to throw the cheesy stuffed animal in the trash, when suddenly a soft laugh floating in from the hallway stops me in my tracks. I look up to see Jennie walking towards the classroom, animatedly talking with another girl. She looks into the classroom and catches my gaze, her features smoothing over. She stops at the door, saying goodbye to whoever she was talking to, and hesitates there for a moment, eyes uncertainly locking with mine.

With the teddy bear in hand, I slowly sink back into my seat, heart racing. Jennie nervously tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, taking in a deep breath before cautiously walking over to her seat. It's then I notice that she has my hoodie which I let her have after the homecoming game, draped over her forearm, her opposite hand anxiously clinging to some of the fabric, making my heart drop. She's going to give it back, making me think this is a means to an end.

"Hi." she says softly, uncertainly, stopping at the edge of my desk. "Uh, I thought you might want this back." She offers me up the hoodie, refusing to meet my gaze.

Fuck, if this is anything compared to what a breakup feels like, thank God I don't date. I'm just not ready for it.

I scramble to my feet. "No, Finch, keep it." I insist, my voice sounding more desperate than I intended. "I still want you to keep it."

She cautiously peeks up at me through her lashes, eyes questioning.

"Finch, I..." I fumble, trying to find the right words. "I'm sorry." I reply lamely, shoulders sagging, but I mean it. I puff out a breath, running a hand through my dark hair. "I lost my cool the other day, and I didn't mean to take it out on you. I just..."

I look around, noticing some fellow classmates' eyes on us. "Can we talk after class?" I plead.

Her features soften and she nods. Removing her backpack, she takes a seat before pulling out her class materials and neatly folding up my hoodie, packing it away in her backpack for safe keeping. That action mildly puts me at ease.

I take a seat, watching her, realising just how much power she has over me. She isn't like any other girl that I've come across before. Most girls go out of their way to capture my attention and compete for it, but Jennie, she naturally attracts it without even trying.

"What's that?" she asks, pointing to the bear still in my hands.

Shit.

"It's.... uh... nothing." I lie, shaking my head, completely embarrassed. Ready to shove the thing in my backpack, I stop when I detect the flicker of disappointment in her eyes. Reluctantly, I end up handing it over to her.

"Actually, it's for you."

She takes it, inspecting it with curiosity. Her thumbs graze back and forth over the soft fur as she reads the message stitched onto the plush heart. She gives me an apprehensive smile. "You got me a bear?"