𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 ~ it's been hours. hours. since i've last seen austin. i have no idea where he is.
he won't answer my texts or calls or anything. he stopped sharing his location with me so i can't check that.
i desperately hold my phone in front of me as i pace in the living room.
lily-rose and madeline sit in front of me on the couch and watch as i slowly go insane.
"maybe you should eat," lily-rose suggests to me in a motherly tone "or drink water, lillian. something."
i stop pacing and abruptly turn towards her "i can't! how can i eat or—or drink water when austin is out there mad at me for cheating on him!" as i spoke, my words became more choked out and tears clouded my eyes.
she stands up from the couch and takes my hands "you didn't cheat, lillian. dacre took advantage of you, it's not your fault."
i shake my head, knowing that if i open my mouth to speak again i'll start full blown crying.
maddy stands up as well "he probably knows it wasn't your fault. he might just need some time to think, okay? but please, eat something."
"i love you guys. but i'm sorry. i can't," i tearfully say "i have to go look for him."
i pull away from my two best friends and walk over to the front door, grabbing the keys on my way over. "lillian!"
ignoring them as they follow me to the door, i swing it open only to find austin right there.
both shock and relief fill me up and i want to smile but decide against it, "austin," i breathlessly say "i'm so sorry—" i cry to him "i didn't mean it. i didn't want to hurt you. i'm so sorry, i promise," i say through tears.
he gives me a sad look and i can tell he's been crying a lot, based on his tear streaked cheeks and red eyes. "i know, lillian," he whispers "i know."
i sniffle "can i hug you?"
he nods and i reach my arms out to hug him and he, thankfully, hugs me back.
⚘ with a cup of tea in my hand, i sit on the couch next to austin after telling him everything that happened with dacre.
"we have to tell baz," he calmly says.
i shake my head "i don't want to. besides, it's stupid."
"it's not stupid, he kissed you and you didn't want him to."
"i know but..." i sigh "i don't know. i just don't want to."
he nods, "okay, i understand."
"but still, i'm sorry. so, so, unbelievably sorry baby."
he places his hand on my thigh and rubs it comfortingly "it's okay, you have nothing to apologize for," he leans forward and presses a firm kiss to my forehead "i should've never freaked out like that. i'm sorry."
"it's okay, baby, i understand," i lick my lips and prepare myself for what i'm going to say next. "i love you."
he smiles at me, "i love you too."
"and when i say that, i mean i really love you. i want to spend forever with you."
his smile only grows at that, "how about we go for a late dinner? and talk everything out."
i smile and nod "id love that."
⚘
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