I feel like when I'm finally gone, my poetry will carry more of an impact,
And be more meaningful.
Right now, as I barely make it through my days,
I feel my poetry is relatable, and for some people,
It might touch their hearts.
But I've also spoken about death, and my suicidal thoughts too much,
That I feel I've torn apart the importance of it all.
Now I feel like all my words relating to such things,
Will be looked at as just words to create shock and awe.
Which brings me back to the purpose of writing this in the first place.
I feel like my poetry will never truly matter,
Or truly be meaningful and carry the level of emotion I want,
Until finally,
I am truly gone,
Forever.
I've been told already that I shouldn't expect to receive notoriety or fame,
Because nowadays most artists, especially poets,
Will go their whole life, and then some,
Without a voice, or anyone knowing their name.
In today's world,
Poetry isn't really sought after as much as music or theatre.
Some have told me straight to my face that poetry is dead,
And has died long ago.
Prompting my thoughts to forgo any chance I had at achieving success,
But yet I still write because it's the only thing I'm good at.
And it's the only thing my heart truly knows.
Recently I've been told I have garnered a good talent,
But this talent will most likely go unnoticed my whole life.
This warmed my heart, but also quickly stabbed it quick and fast with a knife.
They told me I should be more realistic,
And that I should stop living with my head up in the sky.
They told me I will never be the poet I want to be,
Because poetry has already came and died.
Prompting me to believe,
That my poetry will never be as meaningful, and carry the impact I want it to bring,
Until I am gone, forever.
And I hate to say this,
But that person, and these thoughts,
Are probably right.
