Is it my pride that stops me from saying what I truly want to say to some people?
Or is it because I'm just scared of what they'd say back?
There are some people that have come across my life that I truly do miss,
But honestly, I feel like they were the ones to do me wrong in the end.
Maybe that's because I only ever saw my side, and truly never saw theirs.
I'll admit I tried, but the effort I put in to see indeed wasn't fair.
Now I'm lost, I'm stuck,
And I'm alone.
The people I loved most have left me long ago,
Yet their pictures still pop up in my phone.
And each day I see them, I still cherish them anyway,
Hoping they will finally find their way back to me,
Where we can forgive and forget,
And reminisce on good memories.
But I don't think that day will ever come,
The life I live now, it's a product of what I've done.
It's a life filled with so much regret,
I sleep beside a gun,
Because when the memories fill my mind,
I pick up the gun and put it to the side of my head,
And the memories run scared,
Because they know I want to be dead.
But what they don't know is that, I'm afraid to pull the trigger,
I only act bigger than I seem,
Because inside I'm a little man who just wants to let out a scream.
But for now, it works, and they don't suspect anything,
But if they do, and I must finally pull the trigger and shoot,
I want my last words to be-
"I'm sorry for everything I've said and done. I wish I could've been a better friend,
But it's okay,
I see you've already found yourself a better one.
I haven't stopped missing you since the last day of our friendship begun,
And lastly, I hope you can truly forgive me,
Because you were some of the people I truly loved."
