Alpha by heart

Chapter 33: Not a secret

When Alex opened his eyes again, he found himself looking at a familiar face that looked a lot less threatening without the frown, the powerful jaw that is always clenched was a lot softer now but no less powerful. The raised cheekbone, thick brows, everything about Kevin exuded power, showing off his status as a predator wolf. Even in his human form, he was no less majestic than Major. Alex silently observed his mate's relaxed face as his chest rose and fell, softy. He pursed his lips as he observed the dark shadows under his mate's eyes, it made him realise how he neglected his mate while he was busy with his mess. Just because Kevin never complained or went out of his way to make Alex realise he has a mate now, it's easy for Alex to forget about his mate at times. Even when fighting the last battle he remembered looking at Kevin and seeing the worrier Kevin and not his mate, he wasn't used to the new status quo. As the alpha mate, Kevin was Alex's equal, he had as much authority over the pack as Alex, he was no longer only the head warrior of the pack, he was the second alpha and the head warrior, a status much higher than Alex but still, he always stood a step behind Alex showing his respect and submission to his mate and the pack alpha. This one step that neither of them dared to take is like an endless ocean separating them, it's like even when they are touching they are separated by an infinity. It's not like Alex didn't want to take that one step but he just couldn't, what no one has ever realised about Alex was that he was like a doll most of the time. He didn't do certain things because he felt strong emotions that made him do something, instead he did most of the things because that's what is expected of him. He didn't fight the last battle because he is a kind-hearted person or he couldn't see people suffering, he did it because it was the right thing to do and that's what he should do as an alpha. It's just how his thought process work, similarly he didn't bring Jake back because he was particularly fond of the child but because that's what he should do, he should give any orphan pup a home because that's the duty of an alpha. He knew about his mysterious inheritance from a very small age and a certain incident made him scared of his own emotions. From there on he decided to stop feeling things, easier said than done, feelings and emotions are what makes a person human, and it's not possible to stop feeling emotions, especially with his inheritance that fuels strong emotions but what he did manage to do was to develop severe anxiety and ended up becoming emotionally unavailable. It's not that Alex wasn't capable of feeling strong emotions or any emotions at all but more like he only felt emotions for a very short period and then he became numb. The strongest emotion that Alex could feel was anger, it was an emotion that scared him the most because he always feel a burst of anger whenever he is in a battle, he could feel the tendrils of energy emerging from his blood trying to wrap around his body, he always felt most powerful whenever he was angry and then it hit him. The stronger an emotion he feels, the closer he is to revealing his true form. Just like last night, it wasn't hard for him to transform right in front of his family because of the immense nervousness and anxiety he was feeling. It was as easy as blinking his eyes, and when he broke down he could feel something trying to break through him, it was like a strong water current trying to escape. It felt like a massive tsunami trying to overtake him but failing and after that everything went black.

"I like you staring at me but you need to blink or your eyes will get dry." A guttural voice woke Alex up from his dazed state, a confused pair of electric blue eyes met a warm pair of pitch-black orbs. Alex's lips unconsciously stretched in a small smile, as his mate's strong arms tightened around him pulling him to his strong and hard chest.

"Good morning," Alex whispered as his breath fanned over his mate's thin lips and he was answered with a gentle kiss on his dry lips.

"So, what were you thinking this early in the morning?" Kevin asked after they settled comfortably against each other.

"Remember when we were in the Redwood pack and I told you a story about my great-great grandma being a witch and how I was a witch too? But yesterday you saw something different." Kevin hummed when he thought about what Alex just said, yesterday he was in too much shock to think about what they talked about before but now that Alex mentioned it, he did remember Alex telling him about him being a half-witch.