~

431 7 0
                                    

As the night went on, all I could do was lean against a tree and disassociate as I watched Andrea hold Amy, crying her eyes out. Dale tried to talk to me several times, trying to tell me it wasn't my fault, but it truly felt like it was. It truly felt like it was. Amy was too young to die; and the worse part was that her birthday was today.

There was something so obsolete about death I couldn't put my finger on. Something so permanent it alters the chemicals in your brain in one form or another. In the distance, Rick, Shane, Daryl, and Glenn were digging holes for the dead.

Amy, Ed, and a Latino man I never knew or bothered to talk to. I stayed away from connections for this very reason; it spared the misery.

I have bitten the inside of my cheek to raw shreds, and my lips were peeled and bleeding from picking at them. I had to get up, stop looking weak. When I killed Mickey I wasn't this pathetic; I knew Amy didn't blame me. But I blamed myself. Just one second could have saved her life. One second.

I stand up, my hands trying to find stability on the tree behind me. My head spins from the lack of food and water, but I needed to say my proper goodbyes. Amy was too sweet for her own good. Sweet, young, innocent, and had potential. She was tough, kind, loving... I didn't know her for long but she resembled Ava in so many ways.

I stumble over to Amy and Andrea, standing over them.

I bite my lip. "I'm sorry, Andrea." I close my eyes, feeling the burning feeling of despair trying to escape.

Andrea doesn't respond, and was still in a state of shock. Instead, her hand continues to stroke Amy's hair from her pale face while she held a necklace. It was a unicorn, and Andrea had found it for her for her birthday. I look to her arm, seeing the blood had turned dark and contrasted greatly from her pale skin.

I look over to see Jim and T-Dog paired with Daryl, walking over to us. I look to Dale as he looks at me, knowing this was going to be difficult. "We have the holes and fire going... Andrea, we have to bury her soon." Jim says softly.

I look up at them both, Jim's head was down but he broke a sweat and looked ill. Daryl looked at Amy as if she was a complete stranger.

"No," Andrea says softly.

"Andrea, we have to before she turns-" Dale tries to reason, but Andrea blows up.

"No! Okay?! Just- give me a minute, please." She starts crying again.

I look around as everyone rushes over to the source of Andrea screaming, but no one says anything. She was waiting for her to turn, to see her eyes open one last time even if it's not really her anymore. I can't say I blame her.

It seemed like seconds later that Amy started to groan. Her fingers twitch, and her head starts to twitch as well. I look to Daryl and Rick, who nod to me indicating me to shoot if Andrea can't. We don't need to lose another person.

I see Amy's eyes slowly open, the color white and cloudy pupils replacing her original ones. I put my hand on my gun in my pocket as I wait. Andrea still strokes Amy's head, crying as she mumbles to Amy. Amy's arms start to raise and her mouth starts to make groaning sounds as she opens and closes it, catching sight of Andrea.

Within seconds, Andrea reaches her gun and presses it against Amy's head.

"I'm sorry," and shoots.

The gun shot seemed to reverberate across the world for all of us. I look over to everyone, seeing Lori cover Carl and Sophia's eyes. I close my eyes as well, trying not to blame myself for such a catastrophe.

Andrea gets up and storms off without a word.

"She will be fine. Let me talk to her while you guys bury and burn." Dale says with a firm smile as he follows her.

The boys drag off Amy's fresh walker body, wrapping her in a sheet and then tossing her into the big fire. The camp smelled of charred flesh which turned my stomach.

So we all stood around the fire, watching people we once knew no longer exist. The air was filled with heavy silence or soft cries. I look over to Daryl who is next to me, his head pointed towards the ground as the licking flames took over the bodies.

He catches sight of me, and I offer him a small smile knowing he probably felt some sort of guilt beneath the layers of tough calloused red neck. As soon as he locks his eyes with mine, he looks back down.

The world is now a graveyard with no headstones.

Penance (Book One): Daryl Dixon x Sage Wilson Where stories live. Discover now