Penance (Book One): Daryl Dixon x Sage Wilson

~chapter 5~

     "So why'd you do it?" I lean over my plate resting on my lap, spooning away at the pasta.

     "Do what?" Daryl looks to me, his bruising face turning a green yellow color now.

     "Don't play dumb, Dixon. You know.. Rick told me." I set my plate on the side of the nightstand, feeling nauseous. I try to push down the lump of vomit forming in my trachea by swallowing. The pain meds that Hershel had me taking seemed to just make my pain worse. I'd consider the placebo affect over this any day.

     "What, was I just supposed to let you die?" Daryl stands up, placing himself in a defensive position.

     "No, just wondering why.." I say silently looking out to the night country skies.

     "Well if you're so ungrateful about it then damn it, right?" He throws his hands out to his sides, and I lean back into the pillow trying to feel secure. His expression hardens, and suddenly the softened Daryl Dixon I knew was not present in the room at the moment.

     "Why are you so on.. edge? I was just asking a simple question. I just have never had someone care about my quality of my life at all- if it were left to my dead best father and ex fiancé, I'd be dead and barely two feet under right now. Maybe tossed beside a god damn lake, who knows." I scoff as I think about the haunting memories that resurfaced every time I thought about Mickey. Every time I thought about Ava witnessing Mickey abusing the absolute life out of me, watching me stand up and smile as if it was okay.

     "Ion know.." Daryl rubs his hand across his mouth, slamming the bowl to the side of the bed.

     "Is this about Sophia?" I raise an eyebrow, trying to dissect his anger. But the truth was that I didn't know him well enough to even come close to doing that. Daryl Dixon was an onion with more than just several layers.

     "Just stop, damnit!" Daryl exclaims. I remain unphased, knowing I had struck the jackpot to his inner thoughts.

     "Maybe you just need to leave me be for a while. Come back when you're ready to talk?" Daryl looks at my response almost astonished. The truth was that even though it enraged me to be treated such a way I knew Daryl was not that type of guy to find the joy in being angry. He found comfort in it because of his walls.

     Without saying another word, I lay down and pull the covers over my shoulder and face the blank white wall. I can see the shadow silhouette playing behind me, seeing Daryl grab the bowls on the stand and shutting the door with some force behind him.

     See the truth was, Daryl Dixon was a coward. He was a strong one, but he was a sheep that hid inside a lion's coat. He had a very angry side but the side in which he barely expressed happened to be the one he lacked the most in life.

     I could almost ensure his brother was either a low life, a criminal, or abusive. Based on the way he treats and analyzes situations tells me all I needed to know- I was an expert people reader and that was something Daryl would never expect from a girl like me. A girl who ran her mouth and had a strong front but a weaker core that she tried to hold together with scotch tape and gorilla glue. But little did he know, we were more alike in ways he can't see.

     "One day, Dixon." I mumble to myself as I close my eyes and welcome the bricks laying on top of them.