It Was a Yes, But I Never Said It

29. The End

January is almost coming to a close now. Yes, we are one month down in the new year. I wasn't the first one whom he wished New year but I was happy that I was atleast the last one to get a wish from him. He texted "Happy New Year" on his 2nd January.

A wise men said that if it hurts when something ends, then that thing must have been pretty good when it was happening. But an end to something is actually a new beginning to something else.

So has been the case with us. It has been around a month since we last talked. He called twice in the past month but I didn't answer. It's not like I don't want to talk to him and I am trying to ignore him. It's more like I am trying to avoid him for my sanity.

On our last conversation, he mentioned that he flirted with a girl for like three or four months when he shifted to Mumbai. It felt like he had been doing the same with me. I know I asked him out for a month but neither of us could do what we decided to do after a month. I needed that to happen for my self respect to stay intact atleast for me post that one month. I already felt a lot cheap for asking him out for a month. I asked out a guy whom I disliked way too much, the guy with whom I have not talked for more than 8 years and whatever time we have shared 8 years back was all a lie. Basically this guy was no less than a stranger and I dated him for a month. Though it was a very stupid and cheap act, but since he is miles apart, I thought that we would have nothing to do with one another after a month. We will stop talking after a month, I will lock all the emotions related to this incident and would never revisit them.

But it didn't go as planned. And his mention of this girl with whom he flirted, seemed relatable. Sometime from now, he will be telling stories about me to some other girl, talking rubbish about me as well. Stating me as a girl with whom he flirted for a month and got a couple of days as bonus! Sounds hurtful but I knew it when I was signing up for it with my one month dating proposal. This mention just came out as a reality check which I think I needed.

I think I have sufficiently ruined my reputation and it's time I should stop acting and feeling any more cheap. I know it's me who proposed that we should be friends but it's true that it's way too hard to be friends with your ex. Harder than I thought it would be. It takes every ounce of energy from my body to act all cool in front of him as if nothing matters.

I am not saying, that I will step away from our friendship. No matter how difficult it would be, I will always be friends with him. I know for that I will have to get all these emotions in control and I am working on it. Though my heart, chest, everything hurts even with his thought but I will soon figure out a way to sort all this out and accept what has happened in past has passed and we are now friends. I will set boundaries and would never cross them and would not allow him to cross them as well. He lives miles apart in a different country altogether and will soon forget what happened between us. And it wouldn't be wrong to conclude from his recent behaviour and actions that he has already forgotten. 

We survived a month without talking to one another and I think we did pretty good. He moved on with his life and I moved on with mine. Though I think about him a lot many times, miss him and seeing his past instagram photos kind of relaxes me but I am working towards fixing this and I am making some good improvement in this case. Instead of staring at his pictures every day, I am now staring at them on alternate days. Though whatapp DP is still an issue which require my attention every couple of hours. Lol! But we will count this as progress!

I agree it hadn't been easy but I think not talking to one another has helped both of us. The more we talk, the more we think about each other and the more we miss each other.

What happened between us was brilliant and I will always remember it with a smile but now it's time to let it go from my side...

... And that's how our story came to an end

~ The END~

Adira and Rihan connected over a couple of brief calls post that just checking on one another's whereabouts. They stayed friends but lost touch afterawhile. Rihan got occupied with his work and some flirting with other girls. His mom has found a nice match for him with whom he is happily married and is now well settled. Adira moved on with her life and is now an art director as she has always dreamt of. She has also opened her design firm wherein in she heads a team of freelancers. Adira never allowed any other man to enter her life ever again. She is happily living with her parents as both her elder sisters are now happily married and the younger one lives in a foriegn country for work. Her firm is doing well and life is good...

~Both of them lived happily ever after but in their own distict worlds~