Paid Love (Dr.Strange x reader)

Chapter Nineteen

Warning: Here is the warning you've all been waiting for so long... smut.
Merry Christmas (eve)
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He was just about to fall asleep as you couldn't hold it back any longer. "I saw everything."

"Hm?" His eyes flew open. "What did you say?"

"I saw everything."

"I'm sure it must have been difficult." There you knew you both were talking about two different things.

"I'm not talking about my flashback."

He frowned, lifting himself up on one arm. "What are you talking about, then?" He asked while looking at you.

You looked up at him, not saying anything. You could see the gears turning through his eyes.

"I'm afraid I'm not follow-" Then there was this light of realisation replacing the gears and you looked away. "It wasn't a draft. Was it? It was you closing the door."

You couldn't bring yourself to look at him. Nor explain it. You were expecting him to get angry any second now...

"You say you saw... everything?"

Your face turned hot and you nodded very slowly while looking at one of the duvet patterns.

"you... heard me?"

This was more awkward that you thought.

You nodded again, preparing yourself being shouted at for peeking. It was going to come. You knew it...

"I'm so sorry."

Hm?

"What?" You asked confused.

"I know this was very disrespectful of me. I can't even begin to explain how embarrassed I am. I swear it was the first and the last time I did this."

"I- Ehm." This reaction was certainly not the one you were expecting.

"You must think I'm a disgusting, horny bastard. A dick for thinking about you in this way. Sexualising you, actually. I just couldn't help myself after we had that talk about you struggling with the idea of sex and all... It's horrible of me I know... Me getting off on your struggles..." he ran his hand through his hair in frustration with himself.

"You helped me with those struggles."

He scoffed. "That was the saviour complex in me..." He sat up, leaning his arms on his knees to cover his face with his hands in shame. "God, I'm so selfish when you think about it."

Hearing him talk like this was shocking. Usually, when you saw him you would think he'd love himself, and be very confident about what he was doing. Looks like he had hidden secrets and insecurities as well. "Hold on a minute." You placed your hand on his shoulder. "You saved me. You gave me a home and listened when there was anything to listen to. I admit I wasn't very open with you... But I want to change that. That's why I'm telling you this now."

"Wait." His head turned towards you. "You spoke with me, you ate with me after seeing...me do things while thinking about you. And now, you're even laying in bed beside me."

"Yes... I should've been honest with you-"

"How could you stay so calm?" He asked in pure astonishment.

You blinked a few times. "What should I have done according to you?"

"Slap me in the face or something?"

At that, you started laughing but soon realised he wasn't joking. "W-Why would I have done that?"

"You're not mad at me?" He looked at you in disbelief.