Christmas dreams

Scared

Chris POV

After putting my hand on Mia stomach she seems tense. I don't know if I've overstepped, I know this baby isn't mine but I will love it as if it was. I don't want her to think I won't, I know it has taken her some time to come to terms with having this baby. But she is an amazing mum already. I just hope she will be okay with me wanting to step up and help her.

"Mia?"
"Hmmm"
"You okay?"
She nods and gives me a smile, which I know is her fake one.
"What's wrong?"
She shakes her head "nothing"
"Mia come on. I know you"
She sighs "I'm just worried"
"Worried about what?"
"This" she places her hand over mine and I feel her take a deep breath.
"What's got you worried?"

"This baby is mine and I've come to terms with the way it was created and im choosing to move forward and love this child with everything I have."
"I know. Your a great mother Mia"
"Im going to try to be but...."
"But what?"
She shakes her head as she looks down and I see her try to wipe away a tear. I pull over and turn the engine off. I turn to face her and gently tilt her head to mine.
"Mia?"
"What if you decide this isn't what you want?"
"Mia....."

"No Chris please listen" I nod and she continues "this is a lot, we've finally admitted that we love each other and we are only on our first date and things are already complicated. Im having a baby Chris, a baby that isn't yours. That's complicated. What if you hate this child? What if you one day you wake up and realise you don't want to raise another man's baby? What if........ what if you wake up and realise that you don't love me? That this was all just a misunderstanding. I don't think I could take that....."

"Chris, there has always been something about you. You've always had this ability to calm me when I need it, you've always been able to read me like a book. You know what I need before I even do. Your my bestest friend in this world and what if we ruin that? What if you realise that's all I am to you?"
I take her hand and take a deep breath.
"Can I talk now?"
She nods "Mia, when I say I love you, it's not because I feel some obligation too. I fell in love with you a long time ago. I just didn't realise it. You came into my life at a time when I was scared to open up to new people. Scared to open my heart to love again. You helped me and Luca, you became a light in our lives. God Mia you have taken Luca on as your own from the beginning. You've helped him in so many ways. He loves you just as I do"

"Having you in my life has enriched my life, it's made my life better and now I get to have you in my life forever, as the woman I love. And this"
I rub her stomach "this is a blessing from a horrible situation. What happened to you.....should never have happened. But you've chosen to have this baby and love this baby, when I chose to tell you I love you, I chose this baby too. I know I'm not biologically there father but god am I going to love this child as if I am. You have nothing to worry about."

By this point she has tears rolling down her cheeks, I cup her face and gently wipe them
Away. "Now no more tears, this is a first date. It's supposed to me fun"
"Sorry" she giggles
"I love you"
"I love you too"
I drive off to the restaurant, feeling better that she now knows how much I love her and this baby. I just hope she never doubts it again.