My Cup Of Coffee

Chapter 33

I fell asleep during the movie. The comfort I felt was so over flowing, it allowed my body and mind to be at peace for once. No one else home just us. It wasn't until all the guys arrived that I was suddenly woken up. Why are they so loud? Not only were they loud but they had brought a lot of food and unnecessary groceries with them. Sehun looking unpleased with it all. It was dinner time. But I had no appetite. Nor did I seem to have the patience for these boys. Alice had also arrived with Jihyo and Hyuna.

Everyone was here. Except the person who was supposed to be my partner for the day and completely shattered what I really thought was something. I'm dramatic. I've always been. But nothing compares to how horrible she made me feel. What an idiot I am. For letting her get to me like that. Without a problem. How could she be so sweet and tender with me one day. And the next act like I have no feelings, as if I'm her punching bag. And for what?

"Roseanne, babe are you eating?" Sehun called from the kitchen.

"No I already did. Eat up" I smiled at him. Getting up and heading to the kitchen. Deciding to join them all. Soyi and Dohun had arrived long ago. While I slept. They came up to join us for dinner. I've totally forgotten about them. They're barely even home. And whenever I hear from them it's when they're arguing with Y/n. Which doesn't leave a good memory of them in mind. Especially Dohun. He is a nice man. But the way Y/n hates him makes me see him negatively. Though it's wrong, I can't help it.

For dinner we all discussed my wedding. I should be excited and so happy about it. But I can't help but feel worried, I don't want to do this. With little guest, a man I love but question my feelings towards so much. If it wasn't for the club fight I would be married by now. Happily. But now that the girl and I have come to these type of terms, I don't know how to feel about it anymore.

Everyone went straight down stairs to play pool. But after all that had happened today. I just need to lay down and sleep. Before doing so, I had to take a shower. It was fairly late now. Tomorrow will be Wednesday. Already halfway through the week and it's going by so slowly. But next week I'll be home. And married. Every time I think about becoming married to Sehun I feel uneasy. A horrible feeling deep in my gut. One that I hate having. It makes me sick, the need to throw up. Anxious. I just wish I could go back to feeling happy about this. Without having met the girl. Without having done all those things with her. Without possibly falling for what seem like her multiple personalities.

My shower was quick. I barely even stood there. Just washed my hair and body with warm water. Immediately getting out the second I finished. Avoiding the girl entering my thoughts, she's always been in the back of my head ever since I met her. Wether I was infuriated by her or couldn't stop thinking about what we did. One way or another she was there. Slowly taking over how I feel up to the point I didn't even know I felt it until it was too late to stop it.

"Hey you" a voice said the second I stepped out of the bathroom. Of course it was the girl. And of course she'd been out here as I showered.

"Why are you always out here?" I breathed out feeling scared. "Goodnight" I had recovered myself and straightened my back. Feeling glad I changed in there. Having no need in talking to her.

"Are you mad about what I said?" The girl's tone seemed frustrated. Almost as if I had to right to be mad. "I didn't mean it that way. I just didn't know what else to say" there was more coming. I know it. But she stopped talking. Regretting what would've of left her mouth.

"Just forget it" I said. Walking right past her into my room. A repeat of this morning. With a complete different scenario. But this time I felt her gently pull me back to face her. Right at the entrance of my room. Her eyes looking at me, wanting something. Something different than what I usually see in her eyes.