NEVER AGAIN . (SEBASTIAN - SDV)

CHAPTER TWELVE

I was so confused about my feelings. Indescribably confused. For the past five minutes, we've been doing nothing but making out. My hand was brushing his face as I tilt my head to lean into his mouth more. If it wasn't for the white noise blocking out any silence, I would've been asking myself why I felt so relaxed in Sebastian's bed. I was confused that I was continuing to happily kiss him—that I was smiling into his glorious mouth. He was smiling too, but I felt his cheekbones tense as he tried to stop. We were laying beside each other and at some given time, I turned to face him. We laughed as we kept asking questions that we immediately would say "pass" to and suddenly, we slowly leaned in and began to make out.

The kiss was sweet, soft and slow. My hands were holding his neck and face while his hands were trembling on my waist. I never thought I would feel him act so shy with me when ten minutes ago he was holding me like I was his toy to play with. Our knees were tangled up and I couldn't stop pushing my mouth in more, not over need but enjoyment. These kisses were making me forget about all my worries and instead of telling myself I need to worry or there will be consequences, I obliged it like a gift.

He hums on my lips as they close. It was the sound of a regular having his favourite dessert at a diner. He hummed as if he was a food critic that just had the most delightful texture and flavour exploding in his mouth. I giggled on him, dropping my hand from his cheek to the crook of his neck. I kissed him again, dragging my bottom lip on his which made his hands clench. He mumbled into my mouth, "You have smooth lips."

"You too," I say as I give him a small but slow peck. I bent my chin down to pull away but Sebastian —with his eyes still closed— had found a way to kiss me again. I had forgotten all about him leaving me heated and dry. He had this effect and I think I have it too. No matter what, we forget our relationship and do loving things. However, we were loving. If that's even a word. We were relaxing.

We kissed a few more times before I gave him one last peck and pulled away. I watch him flicker his eyes open with a weak frown on his face expressing he wanted more. I ignored him and moved my hands down, intentionally patting the hard length of him before sliding into his pockets. I could have sworn that I heard a weak change in his breathing when I touched him. I bit the insides of my cheeks as I dug into his left pocket and pulled out his phone. He made no sound as I flipped the phone screen to him, he stared at the bright screen and then looked at me.

"Passcode."

He squints his eyes at me and grabs his phone back to unlock the phone. Once I saw the reflection of his home screen in his eyes, I grabbed it and detangled our legs so I could turn my back on him. I heard him add his elbow onto the pillow, head on palm to give him a height advantage to see what I was doing. I ignored the wallpaper of a selfie with Abigail, him and Sam and clicked on the Photos app. I felt his hand quickly jump on my hip and pinched it, a warning to not go on it.

I frowned, "I want to see the picture." He knew what I was talking about but he still held his pinch. I swat away his hand and shuffled away from him. However, I felt his arm wrap around my stomach and pull me in.

"I'll get it," he grumbled. I wanted to laugh at his reaction as he let go of my stomach and grabbed the phone. As I turned around again, my face tilted up and caught his phone right in his face like he was hiding something. I was thinking he had nudes—someone else's nudes in his gallery and I wanted to peek to check. But, I didn't. I patiently waited as he scrolled for a minute or two.

Once he turns the screen to me, he hands the phone back to me. And there I saw me. Me. My young and clearly fried face collects most of the flash of the camera. My hair was straight and mossy green, a few stands on my face from the wind. My eyes had a flick of eyeliner and the inner corners of my eyelashes weren't intact. I cringed, "My fucking eyelashes."