Questions // Mazerunner

22-In which we cannot remember

Newt was gone when Maddy woke, off running the maze. As she wondered over to the kitchen she began to think about yesterday's events. Newt.

She recalled him shaking her awake, almost violently, and then looking so relieved when she opened her eyes she thought he might faint. She remembered him asking her if they were ever going to get out. At the time, she had been relieved, expecting a much worse question than that, but now that she looked back, it puzzled her.

Why would he ask that? Was it not obvious? Of course they would get out. Newt and Minho or Ben could use the ivy ladder to climb up and look at the maze from above. That would tell them the way out, right? And then they could go.

But now Maddy began to question herself. It couldn't be that simple. She wasn't looking at things hard enough. Nothing here was simple. She thought about her dreams, and Newt, and the note and gifts in the box. Nothing really made sense. Her relationship with Newt was confusing enough on its own, without all the stress of the dreams. Maybe it would be better to just leave him alone. Maybe then she would stop liking him so much.

And then she thought, its okay though, because were going to get out, as long as I keep remembering. The memories help. That was when she realised.

She wasn't remembering. She hadn't had a dream for... she didn't know how long. Soon she began to think more and more about it, until it was eating away at the hours. The only thing she really gave to the glade was the memories. The Glade would still be the same if she wasn't here. Because she needed more memories, needed to know more to fully understand.

It was like she had pieces of a jigsaw puzzle, ingredients for a recipe, but it didn't quite fit and left a bitter taste in her mouth. It was all wrong. Why was she here? Why had she been sent here? Why was she so different to all the others?

It didn't make sense.
Newt.
The dreams.
The note.
The gifts.

Who was Lucie? Who is Lucie? How could she possibly be a friend?

And what bugged her most, what the voices in her head screed about the most was: Why can only I remember?

Where did the dreams, the voices come from? They were like a little devil inside her, slowly becoming stronger and stronger as she slid further and further into the depths of depression. And under it all, she knew that staying away from Newt wasn't helping, because he was drowning too. But isn't everyone a little bit selfish? It's just some peoples actions affect others more.

No dreams. No notes. No gifts. No memories. God, it hurt. And thinking, almost knowing, that her sadness was contagious, she distanced herself from all her friends. Newt. Ben. Nick. Fry. No one.

And that was when she knew. That was when she decided, that if she couldn't remember, if she couldn't help Newt get out of this hellhole with her memories, then she would do something herself.

A/N That was really short sorry. Maybe it went on too much... Please tell because I really want feedback. You guys are the best cos you're all so lovely so plz talk to me ☺️
-Katie
P.S. WE GOT 800+ READS AND 25 VOTES *intense fangirling*