Desire of Love | Soap x Fem reader

32

"Whats the plan Sergeant" You looked over to Soap who was sat on his couch looking devastated as not only his best friend but also his captain had betrayed him. "I'd say lets settle for a bit and then get moving as soon as I hear from Laswell. Shes our last hope at the moment" 

You could only nod still feeling dazed from the bullet wounds. Kyle had patched you up wonderful leaving only the pain that is still marinating in your limbs. Gaz was sat in front of the armchair you were in, his head heavy against your leg. He hadn't spoken since the car drive being left with only his thoughts to occupy his mind. Nobody really had dared to talk not wanting to slip out anything that would fasten the tension even more. 

Should you say something? Maybe try to make the boys feel better. Especially Kyle he is a few years younger than you being just in his early 20s. This whole thing is growing heavy on his heart, seeing how his teammates have acted, the stress in the prison and seeing the amount of death and horror cook in front of him. It was a lot to take in. 

Soap knew how to deal with it, as he had been in this field for an ungodly amount of time. The betrayal was hard on his shoulder but so was the raging aggression pumping in his veins because of you. he was in no sense mad at you just so angry that Ghost had almost killed you. He wanted revenge, and he was going to get it. 

Soap eventually stood up, he needed to calm down before he would become something that he couldn't manage nor handle at times. He walked over to your frame and picked you up, making Gaz's head fall against the fabric. "Go to bed Gaz you can sleep in the guest bedroom, get some rest i'll wake you in the morning" He only earned a nod in reply before walking to his bedroom laying you down. 

Johnny fell on the mattress next to you pulling you close in his arms. "You feeling better Love?". 

"It still hurts but i'll survive" Your arms found its way around his body, pulling him closer to feel the warmth that surrounded him. The bullet wound in your shoulder stopped you from sudden movements but allowed enough for you to cuddle with your lover. "i'm so proud of you angel, You survived in that hellhole. I don't know what I would do without you next to me right now" His words were quiet, a small climbs of hope shining in them. He knew that it would have been game over for him, either he would have gave himself the bullet or hunted ghost down until he would be sure that both Simon and his dirty Roach friend would be dead. He is still going to kill them, slow and painfully. To have them know what it feels like to lay somewhere and bleed out slowly.  

"I sometimes miss the old days, you know when everything was just a little easier. You not liking me was the only worry that I kept in my heart" He continued to speak fiddling with a strand of your hair. "The desire to have you in my arms just as you are now growing stronger the further I got to know who you were under the mask." Your eyes met his gaze listening to his spoken words with fascination. "I still think the mask look really sexy" The words playfully whispered in your ear tickling a shy giggle out of your lips. In return, he started to smile even wider, hearing the familiar giggle that warmth his love surrounded heart. 

"I still can't help falling in love with you, You are the perfect amount of serotonin and adrenalin that would keep my blood pumping even if I didn't have a heart" Soft kisses were placed slowly over your face, whispered compliments in between them. Johnny desired everything about you, from the way you blinked to the way you handled the simplest actions. He was obsessed with you. He loved telling you that he loves you, but every so often he has a much larger  desire, a cute aggression every time you do something cute in his eyes. 

The soft of his lips met your own, slowly building a rhythm to move in a mixture of serotonin and heat filled the tight space that was created between your and Johnny's body. Just as he was about to slight his hand under your back to pull you even closer a small knock was being heard by the door. 

"Come in Kyle" Johnny moved away and watched as the door opened locking eyes with the younger. "Can't sleep, you got cigarettes or sleeping pills? preferable both." You locked eyes with Gaz his eyes red and puffy. Dark circles already underneath them, heavy. 

"Yeah i'll get them and have a smoke with you, haven't had one in a while anyway"  Johnny turned to look at you, sending an apologetic smile in your direction. "stay here babe i'll be back" Sending a last wink in your direction he fully disappeared from the door.

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Johnnys pov

Johnny noticed the puffy eyes that signed Kyle, not wanting to leave him alone now Soap swallowed the bitter pill of leaving you alone and walking out to the balcony. 

"Whats wrong Kyle" He took out two cigarettes handing one to the spoken to. "Its alright". "I didn't ask if you were okay I asked about what is wrong" He lit his cigarette taking in a long drag feeling the smoke being placed in his lungs. Kyle did the same taking a moment before talking. 

"Night terrors thats all, can't sleep without them it seems like" A false amused chuckle signed his words. "ah I been there" he took another drag from his cigarette, letting the memories float back into his mind. Sleepless nights, the frustration sex he had with random people. It was all in his past and Johnny was more than happy that it would hopefully stay like that.  "How do you get rid of them?" 

"You can't" 

Gaz met Johnnys gaze. "So you also have them?" 

Johnny shook his head laughing slightly. "I said you can't get rid of them, I don't have them anymore. In your state you are just going to ruin yourself not able to get rid of them. 
Listen to me Kyle because I am not going to do this cheese talk again" Johnny threw the cigarette away grabbing kyle by the shoulders to show him how serious he was about this. "If you let the horror continuously spook in your head, giving it an opportunity to live in their rent-free it will never stop. Kill it with happy memories even if it seems impossible to create new memories. Find happiness in the smallest things even if it just means that you had the chance to talk to someone or have a second to yourself. Jerk off or something fuck knows what makes you happy." 

Kyle looked at him a slight shock written in his face, not daring to answer just yet. Johnny was right he couldn't keep thinking about the negativity that he was facing he had to create something that bought him some sense. Build his own flame until it was strong enough to keep him warm from any sense of cold. 

"Now if you'd excuse me,  I have someone awaiting in my bed." Johnny, send a last nod in Kyles direction before walking inside and to his bedroom.

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Word count: 1276 

holy shit its late. Holy shit I haven't updated in ages. 

More to come soon. 

My brain is not braining so i won't read over it just today. 

also death has signed this book I got every chapter and the end planned and most likely a second book that will continue the story. I will not spoiler anything further and rather get to work. hihi
Don't worry tho, this book will continue with plenty of chapters until I for myself feel like its done, the second book will just be an add-on that will not be needed for the actual story line if it comes as far as me writing a second book we'll see.