The Wallflower of Parkview High

Chapter Forty One

I don't know how long I was in the stall for. It could've been for five minutes or ten or even a half an hour. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if people were lining up outside the stall I was currently occupying, demanding to know who's taking so long despite there being five other stalls here and another restroom on the other side of the school.

What I did know was that I felt like I wanted to throw myself onto my bed and cry for the rest of my life after what I just witnessed. To another regular person, it probably wasn't that big of a deal. After all, friends looked at each other like that all the time.

Were Alicia and Zander friends though? This was the part that really confused me. I would get it if they at least knew each other longer considering they probably attended this school together much longer than I have with them. But friends?

No, they couldn't be friends. It really wasn't possible. After all, she was Alicia and he was Zander. Despite the fact that they were both my friends and both had the ability to create this awkward silence whenever they were around each other, they were the complete opposite of each other. Yes, I know that whole "opposites attract thing" could apply to friends but Alicia and Zander seemed so...opposite...that I didn't think it was possible for them to be friends, let alone acquaintances.

If they were friends though, then why? Why were they friends? I was pretty sure that they wouldn't just casually go up to each other and ask to be friends so it had to be something else.

The reason that my mind instantly went to was because of me. I mean, it certainly made sense, considering they were both my friends. Had they gotten closer to each other because of me? After all, I couldn't see them as the type of people to be friends with each other outside of being friends with me, considering they didn't even interact with each other outside of sitting with me. Well, that was the case except...

The text.

Just thinking about that - that moment made me want to cry, curl up into a ball and never come out again. What have they even been texting about? Whatever it was, it was something that they didn't want me to see (Zander's surprised face that day I had seen him texting Alicia still haunted me). Was it about me? I wouldn't be surprised if it was since I couldn't think of anything that they both wouldn't want me to see that wasn't about me.

That caused another question to come to my head. Why were they texting about me, if it was presumably about me? Were they saying mean things about me behind my back? No, they couldn't possibly be doing that considering Zander promised he wouldn't repeat what he had done to me in the past and Alicia simply didn't seem like the type of person to do that to me since we were too close.

If they weren't saying mean things about me behind my back though, then what other reason could they have to be texting each other? Sitting there and thinking about it felt so overwhelming to me and eventually, the only other possibility came to me, even more worse than the last.

They were hiding something from me.

Yes, that had to be it. That simply had to be the reason they were texting each other. The signs had been all right there this whole time and I had been so stupid as to not see them. The tense atmosphere they had whenever we were all sitting together, the look of alarm that Zander had seen that day at the park when I had seen him texting her, the overexcited tone Alicia had whenever Zander was around, Zander's reluctance to be my friend and even the way they acted when they were just around me when the other wasn't around - it just seemed so happy and carefree. Seriously, how had I been so stupid and not seen the signs when they were right there in front of me? Was I really that blind?

"Hello?" a voice suddenly said, snapping me out of my thoughts. When I didn't respond, I saw someone knock on the stall door.

"W-What?" I murmured, not really wanting to talk to anyone right now.