Tip #1: DO get fired from your lame, sucky job that sucked and was lame

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Grian glanced at his phone, sighing. I kinda have to tell him now- I've been avoiding it for the past few hours. The dirty blonde parrot hybrid winced as he got yet another call from his roommate. This time he answered it.

"Grian! Finally! You've been avoiding my calls for like... two hours? Three?" Mumbo trailed off thoughtfully before sighing. "Why... is that? You normally only do that when you've done something bad." The hybrid winced.

"Well, you see- it's not my fault, buuuut-" There was a sigh from the other end of the phone. "I... am... no longer working at the bank?" Grian said slowly, wincing. He attempted to use his wings as a sort of umbrella as rain started falling, glancing up at the dark sky.

"Wha- Grian! You said you wouldn't quit! I know your job is kinda boring, and it's constantly raided by villains, but- Grian!" The powerless man repeated in an irritated mumble.

"Hey, I didn't quit!" Grian protested loudly, blinking with an embarrassed expression before relaxing and continuing to walk as he realised nobody was around to hear him shouting at his phone in the middle of the street.

"Oh- so you're just messing with me? Thank Void, I was about to-" The gray eyed man cut Mumbo off with an awkward laugh.

"Ahaha- yeah, about that, I didn't quit, exactly. I was, uh, fired, because..." Grian unfolded the piece of paper in his other hand, squinting at the writing and trying to shield the paper from the rain with his arm, leaving him in a very odd position.

He folded the scrap of paper up again, shoving it in his pocket. "Because I'm 'lazy' and 'apathetic' and 'do not care about my job'." The relatively short man said mockingly, doing air quotes with his free hand.

The dirty blonde could practically hear Mumbo burying his head in his hands. "Grian, I- you- why were- what- I- huh-?" Grian winced again.

"Oh, well really, I- uh-" He attempted to replicate the sound of static, grimacing. "Ooos, sorry, going through-" Grian paused for a few seconds, barely holding back laughter. "-tunnel, sorry. Bad connection."

"Grian Gotts, I know you don't have a bad connection, don't you dare-"

"Sorry, bad connection, gotta go!" Grian said in a sing-song tone of voice, giggling as he heard Mumbo's cut off protests as he ended the call.

He put his phone in the same pocket as the piece of paper, stopping for a moment to adjust the strap of his unnecessarily heavy backpack and continuing to walk.

——

Grian drew to a halt as he heard a muffled scream from the alleyway he had just passed, pausing. That is not good- nope, none of your business, Grian. There might be- a villain! Or something. Villains aren't that bad, actually, but whatever. Still.

He winced at the sound of another pained shriek. Okay, nope, gotta go help- The dirty blonde turned around, running back to the alleyway and turning to see a very violent, one-sided fight.

The person winning in the fight was a relatively tall, blue Slimecian hybrid- namely, the hero Pituita- who was muttering something about 'quitting complaining' as he attempted to stab someone stuck to the ground with slime, using the bejewelled diamond sword that he was commonly seen with.

The person stuck to the ground was a short man with messy, bloodstained, dark brown hair, heterochromic green and brown eyes, a mask covering his mouth and nose, tanned skin and freckles scattered across his face.

The villain known as Momentary, who could freeze time (only it was meant to be very physically draining and tiring).

What- Grian blinked as Momentary let out another sob, closing his eyes as blood trickled down into them and attempting to pull himself away from the hero attacking him. I know he's a villain, but I can't just-

He pulled his backpack off of his shoulders as he approached the pair, lifting it as high as he could and smacking Pituita around the back of the head with it.

The hero tensed for a moment before crumpling and falling to the ground. Is he- The parrot hybrid nudged the Slimecian hybrid with his foot gently. I don't think he's dead...?

Grian glanced back at Momentary. "Are you okay?" He asked slowly as he attempted to pick his bag back up. Wow, that thing is a lot heavier than I thought it was if it knocked out a hero- maybe I should start leaving some stuff at home.

The villain opened his eyes slowly, wincing and then staring as the slime holding him in place vanished. "Huh-" It was then that Momentary's gaze landed on Grian, who was still struggling to pick up his backpack. "Don't come any closer, you-" His gaze flicked to Grian's backpack, and then to the hero lying unconscious on the ground next to him. "Did you...?"

"Yep. I- you scream really loud, man. And- I don't know. You might be a villain, but that doesn't mean you deserve death." Grian shrugged.

Momentary stared at the dirty blonde as he scrambled to his feet, leaning against the wall. "That doesn't-" He shook his head, mumbling something that the gray eyed couldn't quite make out. "Thanks. I... guess." The brunette shot Grian another suspicious look.

Then it was as if the world around them flickered, and suddenly Momentary was gone.

There was, however, a trail of blood leading out of the alleyway, implying that the villain had walked away.

——

Grian paused, wincing before opening the door.

He was greeted by the sight of Scar and Mumbo sat on the couch, Scar chattering excitedly about a fight between Hotguy (a hero with no natural powers- part of the ten percent of the population with no powers- who was very skilled with bows) and Dynamite ( a creeper hybrid villain who was somewhat resistant to the effects of explosives) that he'd seen on the TV.

Mumbo glanced towards the door as it opened, staring blankly at Grian.

"So, out of curiosity, why did you hang up on me?" Grian shrugged, smiling awkwardly and doing an odd hand gesture.

"Uh... tunnel?"

New story woo :> writer's block is awful so I haven't uploaded much lately

But have this

(Also BDubs is Momentary and Jevin is Pituita btw :> )

Comments and votes are appreciated <3

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