Only a few minutes had passed since Ignis and Grian had returned when the door opened and Dynamite walked in, practically dragging a very beaten up Momentary along with him.
Grian could hear vague (yet slightly unintelligible) complaints from the shorter of the pair, who's hair and clothes were stained with blood. "She's so- stupid! You know, for a 'hero', Titanium takes way too much joy in stabbing me." Momentary grumbled as he straightened slightly.
Chloro glanced away from her game of Monopoly, sighing and reaching for a bag by her feet. "Every time. Every time! You can't leave headquarters without returning absolutely beaten up." The ginger haired woman added wryly as Momentary sat down with a roll of his eyes.
Sense walked over as well with a laugh, shoving a healing potion in the other villain's face. "Drink it. Loser." She winced slightly before shaking her head and dropping the potion on Momentary's lap.
The brunette let out a mumbled complaint as Grian shot Dynamite an inquiring look, and the creeper hybrid sighed. "We got in a fight with Seize and Titanium while trying to rob the bank." Dynamite said with a mildly embarrassed expression, shooting Warden a glare as the dark haired man let out a snort of laughter. "Oh, shut up."
"Oh, yeah, Seize borrowed my power as well." Momentary complained. "Now I realise how much fighting me must suck."
Chloro sighed. "BDubs, stop complaining and just drink th- oh my void, I just used his name didn't I?" She finished in a mortified squeak.
BDubs let out a laugh despite his pain. "Well, we might as well tell him our names? I guess? I think we can trust him!"
Sense sighed. "Oh, thank Void. It's been so annoying using everyone's villain names the whole time." She said with a laugh. "Now I don't have to be annoyed at myself when I slip up and nearly call Chloro Gem, or- or Ignis Tango." Tango smiled wryly.
"Well, thank you for using my name, Pearl, now I don't have to introduce myself." The red eyed man commented wryly.
Pearl blinked. "Oh, so I'm introducing everyone? Okay! Dynamite is Doc, Warden is Cub and Drain is Impulse!" She finished, puffing out her chest triumphantly.
Cub rolled his eyes. "Well, that's that." The villain muttered under his breath.
Grian laughed. "Well- it's cool that you guys trust me, I guess. Makes it a lot friendlier now that I know your names." He added with a toothy grin.
Pearl nodded enthusiastically, her gaze briefly lingering on BDubs to check that he was drinking the healing potion before looking back at Grian. "Oh, hey, now we can hang out outside of hero-villain stuff!" She said excitedly , and the dirty blonde nodded enthusiastically.
Tango brightened slightly. "Oh- Doc- we did a crime as well! We robbed that- cafe place! Nobody even tried to stop us, we didn't even bring weapons." He added smugly as Doc nodded.
Impulse glanced up from his phone. "Despite nobody stopping you, it's already on the news. And BDubs and Doc's very failed robbery. Incredibly failed. So very, very-"
"Okay, okay, we get it!" BDubs snapped, although there was no real anger behind his words, and he was smiling slightly.
Grian opened his mouth to say something and then paused as his phone rang incredibly loudly. "Uh- one sec-" He pulled his phone out of his pocket, fumbling with it for a moment before answering the call and holding the phone to his ear. "Hello?"
"Are you okay?!" It was Mumbo, sounding incredibly panicked.
"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" The parrot hybrid said wryly.
There was a long pause before his roommate spoke again in a slow, confused voice. "The cafe you work at. It was- it was just robbed by Volare and Ignis. Are you okay?" Grian paused, wincing at how concerned Mumbo sounded. Ohhh, I feel so bad. He sounds so worried. I probably shouldn't have told him I was working at the cafe. He glanced at the other villains, who had all started their own conversations amongst themselves.
Then Grian responded. "Oh, it was? I was just- let me." He paused for a few moments- long enough that it might have given the impression he was checking something- before continuing. "Oh, I just- checked the news! It was! I was on my lunch break, I didn't even realise." There was an audible sigh of relief from Mumbo.
"So you're okay?" The powerless man asked in an oddly suspicious voice. "Are you back in the cafe? Are the police there or something?"
"Uh- yeah, I'm back there." Grian paused at the sound of faint conversation near Mumbo. "No police, no."
There was yet another pause, and Mumbo's voice was oddly strained when he spoke again. "Oh! Okay. You're still in the cafe. Okay, okay, okay. That's- yep. Okay. You work at the- counter, right?"
"Yyyyes. My shift ends... soon?" Grian tried. Oh- no- stupid- why would my shift end like twenty minutes after my lunch break?! "So if you were thinking of coming down there- here- to check on me, don't bother- I'll be gone by the time you'd even manage to get out of work."
Mumbo said nothing, and the silence was so long that the parrot hybrid even moved his phone to check if he had ended the call by accident. The only response he got was an, "Oh. Okay. See you when I get home then." Then the call ended with a click.
Grian stared at his phone with a confused expression, sending Mumbo a quick text.
——
You-
You okay, Mumbo?
Mumbo Kills a lot Jumbo-
Yep.
You-
Oh okay just checking 👍
——
Grian for some reason had a feeling that his roommate was in fact not okay, but he quickly shrugged it off, assuming Mumbo was still a bit shaken by the idea of Grian being at the cafe during the robbery.
He still felt bad about the panic he had caused Mumbo, but it would surely be much worse if his friend found out he was a villain.
Right?
Updated two books in one day wooo :)))
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Grian Gotts' Guide To Villainy (and not dying)
Fanfiction-Grian Gotts' Guide To Villainy (and not dying)- Hello! If you want to become a villain, you're almost certainly going to need this book. It has a few tips on what to do and not do as a villain, and also tells the story of how I became a villain! Is...
