Unwanted--BTS--Soulmate AU

Panic

**Song for this chapter: My Mind and Me by Selena Gomez (team Selena y'all)

Three weeks had passed since Tae and I had danced together at the studio. We had been meeting at the studio every Sunday night in addition to regular coffee dates at the little coffee shop next door after I got off work during the week. We had also been texting pretty regularly. He loved to send me weird pictures of the most random things and they never failed to make me laugh. Oftentimes, he would send me selfies from odd angles that were of himself working in the studio or at home with his cute pom, Yeontan. Today he had sent me a good morning text with a picture of a polished saxophone with no context what so ever. 

Tae was proving to be playful, friendly, and sometimes sensitive. He was definitely a little weirdo, but it was super endearing. Sometimes I was thrown off by how blunt he could be, but overall, he was incredibly fun to be around.

Spending time with him was like hanging out with an old friend while also being new and exciting. But I found myself wondering what exactly the nature of our relationship was. Sometimes, I could feel him staring at me, but when I would turn to catch his eye, he would abruptly look away. Or when I did meet his eye, the look in them was almost like...longing.

He also flirted with me incessantly. He never stopped calling me jagi, and he loved to tease me mercilessly. But I tried not to get too carried away and make assumptions, so I laughed and shrugged it off. 

I wasn't sure about my own feelings towards him either. I was star-stuck at first, (who the fuck wouldn't be? ) but after I got over my initial hesitancy, I found myself opening up to him a bit more. He puts me at ease, but he also sends my heart rate skyrocketing when he flirts with me. The mixed messages were confusing me. I wanted to lean into whatever this is with him, but I found myself stalling. 

I still hadn't signed an NDA but neither Tae nor I had brought it up again. He knew he didn't have anything to worry about with me. I took his privacy very seriously and kept our friendship on the down low. I hadn't told a soul that I was friends with BTS's V. I also made sure to name him "Alien" in my phone so if anyone saw who I was texting, they wouldn't know it was him. It made me sick to know that a lot of people would sell Tae out at the first chance they got. His secrets were mine now too. As a fan first and now a friend, I would go to great lengths to protect his privacy. 

On top of everything, I was still feeling antsy. I was constantly on edge and sometimes I woke up feeling sick to my stomach, but it never got as bad as it did the week before I hung out with Tae for the first time. It always settled down when I was close to him physically, but it almost felt like a sense of missing. Missing what, I didn't know. It was so frustrating. It was like getting close to solving a mystery and then being thwarted right when you are about to close the case. 

Lyle was still essentially MIA. I had cornered him one day before he could run off after his class let out and grilled him about Ren. He admitted to me that he was spending all of his time with Ren lately and that he was sorry he was not around as much. He was super apologetic and sincere with me, so I let it go. I know how fixated he gets on things, and I couldn't say I was any better than him. I was constantly checking my phone to see if Tae had texted me and I looked forward to every Sunday with excitement. 

Today was Thursday, so I had a good distraction with Dae-jung's class. They were especially chatty tonight, so I decided to throw out my planned lesson for the week and just try to get them to converse with each other in English. 

As they were all talking to one another, Dae-jung came up to my desk. "Hi seonsaeng-nim! How was your week?"

I grinned back at him and replied in English. "It was good. How was yours, Mr. Cho?"