Falling In Love at a Coffee Shop

Chapter 22

It's been about two hours since I got home from the carnival and I was still stuck on my bed crying. Nothing really happened but just seeing him, hearing his voice brought everything back to me that I didn't want to remember. His voice is so clear in my mind as it was when I was with him. I could feel his touch on my skin as if it were yesterday. All of his words he used to say just came back inside my head all at once.

You're worthless.

You'll never find someone else to put up with you, to love you.

Will you shut shut the fuck up and listen?!

Sometimes your depression makes it impossible to be attracted to you.

It's a never ending list of terrible things that he said and did. I get angry with myself from time to time, thinking about how I let this happen to me. How I let him control me for so long.

Pulling my knees to my chest I wrap my arms around them and lay my head down. Letting out more and more sobs as each minute passes. I don't know how long it's been before my phone begins to ring beside me.

Lifting my head up, I reach for my phone and see that it's Munro. I hesitate for a few seconds before I decide to press answer, clearing my throat a bit before I do.

"Hey." My voice comes out so soft and weak it's almost unrecognizable.

"Hey beautiful, I just wanted to call and check up on you. You didn't really seem alright when I last saw you." His smooth voice soothes my nerves just a little, it's sweet that he wanted to check up on me.

"Yeah I'm fine, I told you it was just something I ate." The lie is so forced, I want to tell him but I don't want to worry him and I'm scared of how he may react.

"Yeah I know that's what you said but I'm not buying that." He pauses for a bit before continuing. "You know you can tell me if it was something I said or did. I just want you to be okay."

"No no you didn't do anything wrong I promise, I just...I.." The words are no longer able to come out of my mouth as I just think of saying them out loud. I can't help the tears that begin streaming down my face.

"Is it okay if I come over?" He asks softly.

"Yes...please." I sound so desperate but I needed him, I needed my person.

"Well that's good, cause I'm kind of already here." I practically jump off my bed and run to my window seeing him standing there with a soft smile on his face. I pointed to the direction of the front door so I could meet him there. Once he started walking over there I left my room and began running down the stairs, swinging the door open to let him in.

"Hi." My voice comes out so weak I'm about to start breaking down again. As if he knew he closed the door behind him and pulled me into a hug. I begin sobbing uncontrollably into his chest as he rubs his hand up and down my back trying to sooth me.

"It's okay I got you, you can talk to me if you want. You don't have to but just know that you can. I'm here for you okay? I'm not going anywhere." He kisses the side of my head and rocks us back and forth before I pull back to look at him.

"Thank you." My vision is blurred from my tears as I look up at him. "We should go to my room to talk." He nods and takes my hand as I lead us upstairs, once we're in my room we both sit on my bed. I look down at my hands, hesitating for a few moments on telling him before I finally get the strength to start talking.

"Um so, you remember I told you that I was in a bad relationship before right?" He slowly nods his head, looking very worried in the process. "Well I um.. Ran into him on my way to the bathroom. I always knew there was a possibility that I would run into him but a part of me just never thought it would actually happen. I was in complete shock and just had to get out of there, as far away from him as possible. It triggered a lot of bad things and.." I took a shaky breath before going on. "I was just reminded of all the terrible things he did, he was a really bad person. He um, he used to abuse me verbally and physically. It just brought it all back, I thought that I was over it, I really thought I had finally gotten over it but seeing him just brought it all back. Seeing him made it feel like I never even healed from it. And I wish I had told him off, I wish that I was brave enough to tell him everything that's wrong about him but instead I just stood there in shock." Shaking my head, the tears continued to flow.