BLACK ROSE

The bathroom door

Ashley. 

I do as Leo says. For a while I just dance by myself, letting my body relax to the rhythm of the music. At times it feels a bit weird and lonely, but the drug in my system is preventing me from acknowledging the usual anxiety.

When I get tired of dancing I head to the bar. For the first time tonight I carefully study the menu. I can't say I've really succeeded in my attempt to make friends. I've almost made out with a boy and helped him cheat on his girlfriend, and I've magically met a boy I've only seen through before. And yet I've made no real friends and spent almost no time with Mae.

I go with the drink she ordered the first time. Partly because I got too lost in my own thoughts when reading the menu, partly because my vision isn't sharp enough to differentiate between the letters and I know it tastes good.

Speaking of the devil... As I turn around my eyes meet Mae's. She's smiling brightly at me, waving her long fingers. The first thing she does is order herself the same drink, then turns to me with raised eyebrows.

I just smile nervously at her.

"So?"

"So?"

She rolls her eyes. "I see you found yourself a boy." I wait for her following words. "And almost copied the dances from Dirty Dancing." She sips from her drink without taking her eyes off me. "And then you kissed."

Oh. Well, that's about exactly what happened. "Yeah.".

"I want to know everything!" She exclaims.

When I don't get any words out of me, she encourages me to talk with her eyes.

"What do you want to know?"

"Everything! Who is it?"

There's a small part of me reluctant to tell her everything, and the other is hating myself for it. In a sense she's still a stranger. A stranger that's willing to build a friendship with me. What's the worst that can happen?

"Remember the boy from Tuesday? The one behind the fence?"

She slowly nods, then widens her eyes when she realises. "No way."

I nod with a soft smile. It's hard to believe we'd ever meet again, yet here we are, at the same party. The corners of her lips turn upwards. "Who is it?"

"He's a year older, and used to go to our school."

"What's his name?"

"Leo."

What happens next surprises me. Her smile fades. Within a second her smile is back on her place, as if it never disappeared in the first place. It happened so fast I doubt my own eyes, but I swear I saw her frown.

"Doesn't ring any bells."

The first lie she's just told me. Or not?

"Is he a good kisser?"

I nod, vigorously, and she burst out laughing. She wants to know more about Leo. At first I think about not telling her at all. Her lie or not the whole truth confuses and worries me. But then I tell her everything I know so far.

The next hour or so we just sit at the bar, talking and laughing. We cover every single topic possible, mostly focusing on boys. I realise the only thing keeping me away from a healthy friendship with Mae is my own fear and mind.

Somewhere during our conversation, she starts to pay a little less attention to me. At some point she looks behind me and completely stops listening to me. Her smile slowly starts to fade without her realising.

"I'm sorry, I'll be right back." She excuses herself. I follow her with my eyes, trying to spot whoever caught her attention, but with no luck. I can't see anyone who could possibly be disturbing the typical party scenery. For a few minutes I remain sitting, thinking about why she left. I strictly tell myself to not jump to stupid conclusions.

After what feels like an eternity, the euphoria starts to fade away. The world slowly loses its shine and starts to get boring. Whatever magical effect these drugs had on my mind is disappearing. It gets too much to handle, so I leave. I need to survive this night and there's only one way.

********

The bathroom I used the first time is occupied by a couple having a heated make out session. They're throwing themselves at each other. I stop a girl and ask her for directions to the other bathroom. With slim long fingers she points all the way across the dancefloor. With a groan I prepare to push through the crowd.

I stumble upon a problem. The girl never told me which door. I stare at all the doors, contemplating which could possibly pass as the door to the bathroom.

"You don't wanna go there." A raspy, husky voice speaks behind me.

I jump at the sound, turning around at lighting speed.

No.

Oh no.

What luck do I have today? What is happening tonight? Have I put a curse on me? I can't explain it.

I widen my eyes at the sight of the male leaning against the wall over for me. I swallow hard as his eyes pierce through me.

The light reflects off of his long necklace, hitting my eyes. Automatically my eyes travel to his collar bone tattoo that's only visible partly. His left hand, tucked deep down in his pocket, and right, holding a glass of what seems to be either whiskey or bourbon, are both embellished with chunky silver rings. Alongside his complete black outfit and veiny hands, contoured with small tattoos, they create a mysterious aura and aesthetic.

The god of sex, I tell myself.

"Why?"

His eyes, still so piercing blue and full of secrets and mysteries, never leave mine. He's staring deep down in my soul with a look so seductive and flirtatious it makes my knees week. As if he's playing a game with everyone around him, yet he's the only one aware.

My eyes slowly travel down his body, down the black shirt with the top three buttons unbuttoned, to the rolled up sleeves, showing snippets of his tattoo extending down his forearm, down the black jeans to his black shoes. On the ground they linger.

"I don't think a basement is very entertaining."

"Oh," I say softly. I can feel him looking at me. "Where's the bathroom?"

When I lift my eyes again, his still haven't left mine. As if they never left mine in the first place.

"Down the hall. The last door."

He doesn't ask why I tried to open that door.

"Thank you."

There's nothing more I can say to him, so I just leave. He, on the other hand, doesn't move. A simple nod as he sips from his drink.

Who would've guessed I'd ever see the boy I spilled my coffee on again?