I See You ( Neteyam fanfic )

Unwavering Part 1

I wake up disoriented, in a daze. I look over and notice the empty spot next to me and the memories of the night before came crashing. 
"Fuck..." I whisper angrily to myself. I know just created a giant mess. Even though it was so... so good. I probably just fucked Lau up even more.
"UGH WHY AM I LIKE THIS?!" I scream into the pillow as my fists hit the bed. He probably feels used and now I feel like an asshole. I take a deep breath and decide to go find him. I quickly get up, get dressed and leave the marui. I notice him with my father and a few other hunters in the distance on their skimwings. I call to Neya and go to them. As I begin to approach them, Lau is hanging back while the others continue, and I quickly catch up to him.
"Hey." I say, giving him a half smile.
"Hey Caya..." He mumbles with a stoic expression.
I sigh heavily as I'm scanning his face. "Can we talk about last night please?"
"I'm busy right now." He responds solemnly.
I roll my eyes and take Neya up to my father.
"Masempul." I smile at him, and he looks at me, bewildered.
"Yes maite?" His features soften and he grabs my shoulder, squeezing gently.
"I need to steal Lau for a while, is that okay?"
"Of course." He nods and winks at me.
I turn and head back to Lau.
"You are no longer busy. Now come." I command.
"Yes, bossy daughter of Olo'eyktan. As you wish." He grumbles and rolls his eyes.
I begin guiding him to another island and we both sit by each other in the sand.
As I sit beside Lau, I take a deep breath and gather my thoughts before speaking. "Look, I know things got really intense last night..."
Lau looks at me with a mixture of frustration and confusion, "Intense? That's what you're calling it? Not passionate, not amazing, not the best night of my life. But intense?"
"FOR FUCKS SAKE LAU COME ON! I'm all sorts of fucked up in my head. But I don't want to hurt you... I meant when I said that I love you too."  I sigh as I put my head in my hands.
"Caya, I need to be honest with you. When I woke up, I felt like you used me. I know you're grieving and got a lot of fucked up shit going on in that head of yours. You don't think I wanted to wake up and feel happy?"
I look at him and wince. This is what I was afraid of.
"I don't want to be someone you use to forget about your pain, just to feel better for a little while." He mumbles in a pained tone.
I pause for a moment and shut my eyes tight before responding. "Lau, I didn't mean to use you. I just... I needed someone to be there for me, and you are someone that I am comfortable with."
I can tell he's getting angry, and he lets out an irritated sigh.
"You KNOW that I AM FUCKING IN LOVE WITH YOU! I tried to stop you. But you made it really hard to do that when I woke up with my dick in your mouth." He scoffs at me in disgust as he rolls his eyes.
I'm so sorry, Lau." I say, my voice barely above a whisper. "I never meant to hurt you. I was just so lost and alone, and I thought that maybe being with you could make me feel better in that moment. You are the only person that brought me out of my depression."
Lau's expression softens, and he takes my hand in his. "I know, Caya. I know how hard this has been for you. But you have to understand that I can't let you use me like that. I want nothing more than to be with you, but I want it to be right."
I nod, feeling tears well at the corners of my eyes. "I understand, Lau. I promise I'll do better. I'll try to find other ways to cope with my grief, and I won't put you in that position again."
Lau sighs and pulls me into a tight embrace, holding me close to his chest. "I'm here for you. We'll get through this, together."
My body relaxes in Lau's embrace, feeling safe and loved in his arms. I wrap my arms around him and hug him back as he rests his cheek on top of my head. We stay like that for a moment, listening to the waves crashing as we overlook the sea.
Lau chuckles softly and shakes his head. "I still can't believe you came on to me in my sleep. I mean... talk about taking advantage of a guy!" He jokes, a playful smile on his face.
I roll my eyes and nudge him lightly. "Oh, please. You fucking loved every minute of it."
He grins at me. "You kidding? That was the best wake up call of my life! I never saw that coming."
I giggle and begin to blush.
"Seriously though..." I say, my tone turning serious once again. "I don't want to mess things up between us and have everything ruined to where we never talk again."
"I know, Caya." He replies, his hand reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. "You know I care about you. We'll figure this out."
I nod, feeling a sense of calm wash over me. "So, where do we go from here?"
Lau takes a deep breath and looks at me, his eyes full of intensity. "Well, I'm not going to lie... I can't help how I feel. But I also don't want to do anything that will hurt you or me..."
I nod, understanding where he's coming from. "I get it. But...what if we just take things slow? And if things happen... we'll deal with that as it comes."
Lau considers my words for a moment before nodding in agreement. "Okay. As long as we're on the same page and you tell me what's happening in that brain of yours, we can make this work."
I smile, feeling a sense of hope wash over me. "I think we can too."
My face drops for a moment. "What if Neteyam does come back though?"
He stares at me intently as his brow furrows in sadness. "Then I will lose you..." He sighs. "Again."
I scan his face and my heart begins to race as it begins to break for him. I feel like a horrible person for playing with his feelings even though I do truly love him. But nothing can ever compare to the love I have for Neteyam.
"But..." He mutters. "I would rather have a limited time with you, than none at all."
He begins inching closer to my face as he looks from my eyes to my lips.
I hesitate for a moment, torn between my feelings for Lau and reminding myself of my undying love for Neteyam. But as Lau leans in closer, his eyes locked onto mine, I find myself giving in to the moment. His lips meet mine in a fiery kiss, igniting a passion within me that I haven't felt in so long. His hands cup my face, pulling me closer to him as we deepen the kiss. I feel his tongue trace my lips, seeking entrance, and I eagerly open my mouth, allowing him to explore me. Our tongues dance together in a sensual rhythm as our bodies press against each other, the heat between us growing with every passing moment.
We pull away slowly, Lau begins to caress my cheek with his thumb, and he sighs softly. He's gazing upon me with so much adoration and tenderness, seemingly taking in every detail of my face.
"In a different life we would have been perfect and been so happy together. I just know it. I just wish your father let me approach you sooner, I wish I would've disobeyed him and told you how I felt.. and maybe just maybe we would've been mated and already had a life before the Sully's ever showed up. But I wanted to be in the good graces of the Olo'eyktan because he taught me everything I know."
I feel a pang of sadness as I listen to Lau's words, knowing that our circumstances have made things difficult. But in this moment, as he looks at me with those ocean eyes, I feel nothing but adoration for him. I place my hand on his, giving it a gentle squeeze.
"I know, Lau. And I love you too." I say softly, my voice filled with emotion. "But we can't change the past."
He nods, his eyes never leaving mine. "You're right. And right now, all I want is to be with you."
I smile, even though my heart feels like it's being torn in half. "Let's take things one day at a time and see where this takes us." He leans in and kisses me once more, and as we pull away, I know that whatever happens in the future, I am grateful for this moment.
Lau takes a deep breath and looks at me, his eyes filled with an intense sense of sincerity. "Caya, I promise that I will be here for you, no matter what happens."
His words send a wave of emotions coursing through me. I'm heartbroken by his commitment and the depth of his love for me. But I can't help but feel guilty for entertaining the thought of being with Lau... my heart truly belongs to Neteyam.
"I just still can't believe he's gone..." I say, my voice cracking slightly as I look over the sea, across the horizon.
Lau nods understandingly with a hint of sadness in his eyes. "I know, Caya. I just want you to know that I will never do anything to hurt you or come between you and Neteyam if he returns."
I nod slowly and turn to look at the sea again, feeling the overwhelming sadness taking over me. I'm trying my best to fight the tears, to be strong, and to find the will to move on with my life... and to figure out my fucked up feelings.
"We should return to the village. There's something I need to do." I whisper softly.