Part of Your World {A Bungo Stray Dogs fanfic}

The Mind Lies Pt.2

***********TRIGGER WARNING: Self harm/Suicide***************

It's not until 7 o'clock the next morning that I wake up. I'm jolted awake by the sound of the doorbell ringing incessantly. Walking tiredly out of my bedroom, I find Creed sitting by the front door, his tail wagging excitedly behind him. Creed only gets excited to see one person, other than myself- Dazai. Sure enough, I open the door to find the man himself waiting just beyond its barrier. 

"Good morning Sunshine," he says, all too cheerfully. He goes to say something else, but I cut him off. I run up to him and wrap my arms tightly around him, nuzzling my face into his chest and closing my eyes tight. I'm so glad he's okay. 

With a light chuckle, he hugs me back saying, "Looks like someone missed me, huh." He's right. I've missed him more than he knows.

 "Come on, I have a lot to catch you up on," he adds, and we move to sit on the couch. I make a fresh pot of coffee while Dazai fills me in.

"The Guild has captured Atsushi," Dazai begins with no attempt to beat around the bush. 

"WHAT?!" I almost drop my cup of coffee.

"I know, I know, but I have a plan," he takes a sip of the warm bitter substance. 

Of course, he has a plan. Dazai always has a plan. I have nothing to worry about.

"I can't explain everything, he continues, "but I need you and Creed to help place two dozen signal jammers around the city." He pulls out a map and shows me the 24 locations. "I'll take this half," he says as he points to the north and west areas, "and you guys can take this side," pointing to the east and south.

"Ok, I can do that," I say, nodding and studying the map thoughtfully.

"It's not going to be easy," he gets very serious all of a sudden. Dazai explains that the Port Mafia has released a very dangerous gifted child called Q. He doesn't go into detail, but he tells me that Q has the ability to control minds and cause his victims great pain. Dazai predicts that everyone in Yokohama is about to be under his control. 

"They will try to hurt you," Dazai says, looking me directly in the eye, "can you handle this?"I think for a moment. Dazai doesn't know about what happened yesterday. 

And he doesn't need to know, I decide, it was a one-time thing.

"Of course I can handle it. You can count on me!" I say confidently.

"Good. Let's go."

After collecting the egg-shaped smoke bombs and strapping them to Creed, Dazai and I split up. I head to my section of the map, with Creed leading the way. I have Creed alert me to oncoming civilians so I can avoid them as best I can, but some of these people are downright vicious. Along the way, I get into a few unavoidable scuffles. But I refuse to pull out my gun on an innocent person, so I resign to fighting them off with my bare hands. Just like Kunikida taught me. Creed helps too, but he's a little skittish about hurting anyone. Understandable, since that's how he ended up in the shelter all those days ago. While I set up the eggs, Creed takes up his position behind me and watches my back, barking at anyone who comes near. By noon, we've set up all but three, and I managed to make it out with only a few cuts and bruises. I'm clearly faring much better than Yokohama. As far as I can see, there's nothing but absolute wreckage. Cars are crashed throughout the streets. A train has been thrown off its rails. There's fire and smoke everywhere. People are walking around like crazed zombies. And there's not a single place you can go where you don't hear gunshots in the distance. It feels like the end of the world.

Just trust Dazai's plan, I keep telling myself, It'll all work out.

I've moved to the south part of the city and am attempting to set up my third to last egg, when I'm thrown to the pavement. Creed starts barking wildly at my attacker, but the man is long gone, his mind under someone else's control. He continues to pursue me aggressively as I struggle to get up off the ground.

'Let me at him!' Creed begs me with a loud snarl.

"No, we can't hurt them!" I yell back at Creed over the noise of an explosion in the distance. 

Even so, I can't help but reach for my gun as the man backs me into a stone wall. I have to complete my mission no matter what, right? One life to save millions... I grit my teeth and clutch my gun tighter as I weigh my options here. But before I can come to a conclusion, a black blur whirs past me and throws the man aside. Thank God, I'm saved from having to make that terrible decision. I'm saved by none other than

Akutagawa.

I turn my gaze over to him and find an amazing scene unfolding before me. The Port Mafia has banded together and is fighting for Yokohama. It dawns on me that this city is their home too. We're all fighting for the same thing here.

"What are you doing here?! It's dangerous!" Akutagawa yells angrily at me as he fights off another enemy, "And what the hell are those eggs?"

"They're smoke bombs, and I have to set them up before Atsushi falls from that ship. It's the only way for Dazai to get us out of this!" I yell back at him, pointing up at the great Moby Dick.

I can tell Akutagawa wants to ask more questions, but instead he calls to his men, "You heard her! Protect her at all costs!"

Without a single argument, a group of port mafia members immediately moves into position around me. I look questioningly over at Akutgwa.

"Consider us even now," he says in response.

Under the mafia's protection, Creed and I complete our mission with ease. With no more reason to help me, the mafia members return to Akutagawa. I, on the other hand, make a break for the area Dazai and I agreed to meet after we completed our respective parts of the mission. Creed and I dash from alley to alley, sticking close to the buildings and hiding in the shadows, until we finally get to the spot. In the process of moving quickly about the city, my foot lands directly on top of a newly sprouted flower bud pushing up through a crack in the pavement. I don't even notice it as it becomes crushed under the weight of my hurried footsteps...

I round the last corner to our meeting spot, excited to announce to Dazai that I did a good job and succeeded in the task he gave me. But as I make that final turn, my heart stops, and my smile vanishes from my face. There in front of me lies the bodies of all my friends. Dazai. Atsushi. Kunikida. Kenji. Ranpo. Kyoka. They're all- they're all dead. 

"NO!!" I cry out. I run from body to body checking for a pulse, for breathing, for anything that might tell me they're alive. My breath gets caught in my lungs and tears start streaming down my face...

This can't be happening.

I go from body to body, but no one moves. Their eyes all stare right back at me, unmoving, and lifeless. Their figures lie strewn across the block, mangled and drenched in blood. They're all cold. So cold. By the time I get to Atsushi's slaughtered figure, my body is shaking violently with the weight of my sobs. And then, I come to the last fallen body- Dazai's. I collapse roughly to my knees, screaming and crying.

"No! No no no, no!" I cry out once more. 

I slide my arms under his limp body. Between the blood and my tears, my clothes are drenched. Sobs continue to roll through my body endlessly, violently. I shake Dazai's body in a half-hearted attempt to make him up. But it's hopeless. He's gone. They're all gone. 

I sit there clutching his body, my clothes ripped and dirty, covered in blood, hair matted to my face and neck. This is where I give up. These people are my world. I have no reason to be here without them.

My fingers wrap around the cold peace of metal strapped to my leg. It slides so smoothly from its holster. It feels weightless in my grasp. I raise it delicately to my temple. My hands don't even shake as my index finger fits perfectly into the trigger. No hesitation. I close my eyes, pressing down until I hear the metal click. And then

Darkness.