My Life Without Her

-Prologue-

The last time I saw Lucas Anderson was 7 years ago. I remember that day like it was yesterday and it still haunts me. It is the day I experienced my first heartbreak.

I'd never felt anything similar, and I'd never want to feel that again. That empty feeling like something is missing, a horrible feeling I'd never wish on anyone.

I'd called, sent e-mails and received complete and absolute silence as a response. It took me two years to finally realize that he wasn't coming back and that I had to move on. That was the hardest part, acceptance.

I still think sometimes, if things would've turned out different that day, if he had turned around and just... stayed, would we still be together? What kind of people would we be? Because I sure wasn't the same person I was in high school. I was now a 'college drop out and recently published author', as Dinah would put it. I really don't know where I'd be without Dinah or Danielle, those two girls really helped me through everything; and I know that it was probably just as hard on Danielle as it was on me, but she sure was good at keeping her emotions to herself. I guess that seeing him leave so many times mentally prepared her for the day he would never come back. And he never did.

Moving to New York because of my book was probably the best decision I ever made, I was close to the girls... and Nate, my fiancé. We met just when I had dropped out of college five years ago, and being with him was geat, he made me happy, he really did.

But even if everything my life seemed to be getting better, and that I was finally starting to get somewhere in my life, someplace where I was happy; life always finds a way to throw that happiness in your face and ruin it.

And do you want to know how it happened?

I saw him again.

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Picture of Julianne Hough as Eleanor on the side.