In The Shadow of Love

Chapter 40: Heart to Heart

Those of you who suffer from mental health issues and depression, these next few chapters and this arc are going to be heavy for you. Just so you know. Remember that there's no shame in reaching out for help and your feelings are valid and real.

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Professor Hecat walked across the front of the room silently, a grim expression on her face as the students all took their seats. It was an oddly solemn silence as they waited for Hecat to speak, the sound of spring rain starting to patter against the windows.

"While you are in my classroom, I will ask that you trust me." She said at last.

Diane didn't like the sound of that. What was she planning? What was this lesson?

"This lesson could be one of the most important of your life, for a multitude of reasons. Today we will be studying dementors."

Sebastian felt the color drain from his face. The thought of that terrified him, he'd been so close to actually going to Azkaban...

"Dementors are creatures that hate warmth and love. They are born from decay and ruin in the darkest corners of our world. They feed on anything that can feel happiness." Hecat spoke quietly. "I pray you do not ever encounter one of these creatures, but it is my duty to prepare you nonetheless."

Diane shivered a bit that such a creature even existed. She glanced over to Ominis, seeing the solemn expression on his face. What was he thinking about? Had he ever 'seen' one?

"The signs of a dementor are luckily fairly obvious. You will feel a cold chill to the air. The lights will seem to dim around you." Hecat's voice seemed to trail out for a moment before she continued. "You will feel as if you could never be happy again. It is a terrifying, gripping feeling. They want to prevent you from feeling happiness, because it is their weakness."

Hecat walked over to fiddle with something on the table of trinkets she kept in her classroom. "Dementors will attempt to drain your life by sucking the happiness out of you. This will cause you to relive your worst memories."

She set down the object she was fiddling with- a small wooden horse- and walked back over to the front of the class. "Having the life sucked from you will leave you catatonic. You will be unable to move, having no will to do so. If unable to be stopped, they will eventually take your very soul. If that happens, you will not be able to think. Not be able to move. Not be able to speak. You will be alive, and able to feel your hunger and thirst but unwilling to satisfy it. You will simply exist."

Hecat looked across the room at the students, the silence so heavy they could hear the fearful breathing of everyone in the classroom.

"Most teachers would move on to teach you the patronus charm, now. I believe that in this class we speak of darkness from all corners of our world, even within ourselves." She started pacing again as she spoke. "Some of you have experienced life differently than most of your classmates. You have already seen the suffering this world has to offer." She glanced to Diane, who tensed under the look before she moved on.

"I have always likened depression to that of a dementor." Hecat said softly. "It steals your happiness. Prevents you from doing anything you love. Leaves you feeling empty. If you feel this way, there is no shame in telling your friends or family... or even the faculty here at this school. Every professor wants what is best for you students, and that includes your mental health."

Diane looked down anxiously, no longer able to make eye contact with Hecat.

"That being said, simply thinking happy thoughts, or trying to be happier will never be enough to deal with depression. Mental health is only improved by seeking help to find the source of your suffering, however deep it may be in your subconscious." Hecat turned back around to face the class. "Your assignment before the next class will be to discuss your feelings with someone you trust. It will be imperative that you do so before you attempt to cast a patronus charm when we next meet."