Connected.

Chapter 12:An ending with a beginning

After that beautiful day, something bad had to happen.
I gave Emmerson a sweet kiss of goodbye followed by some sweet words, who actually mean something this time. They weren't just words thrown out of my mouth, they were words I felt in my heart and soul. I embraced him too, and his hugs have always made me feel complete, it's because the right side of one's chest doesn't have a heart, so it's empty, and when you hug someone you will have a heart on both sides. I don't remember who said that, but now I understand why I always felt complete when I embraced my Emmerson.
On my way home it started to rain, therefore I put on my headphones and listened to some tunes, because it made me feel calmness.
When I entered my house, I saw and heard some things that shocked me.
My parents were fighting! My father was threatening my mother with divorce, meanwhile my mother was sitting in a chair and crying. My father was too busy yelling at my mother, because she was the only person who saw me when I entered the house.
She quickly wiped the tears off of her face, avoiding her purple eye and bruised nose.
I was so confused with what happened, that I didn't shed a tear. My father told me to sit down in a overprotective tone, followed by my mom rubbing her hand on my back.
'We're separating, *deadname*, it's the best decision to the both of us. Your mother has been showing infidelity to me and our marriage, and I personally think the best decision is for the both of us to part ways. Of course we will still see each other, just not that often. Your mom will take custody of you, and I will send you monthly allowance.', said my father without any hesitation.
'Y-yes, that's right! It's the best for both of us!', stated my mother with disappointment.
'I understand your guys's decision, and I know everything is going to be alright because I will still be able to see you two, thank you for being such good parents to me and thank you for trying to understand me all throughout my childhood until now, I love you two!', I expressed.
'We love you too!', said the two of them in a choir.
I went upstairs and bedwarded myself.
The hardest things for me were separations and new things. And when those too are combined, it was like the world was ending.
I had a really deep fear of abandonment, and a feat for the unknown, that could've only been treated in therapy.
Those fears go back to my childhood. The fear of abandonment was caused by me not having many friends when I was a kid.
And the fear of the unknown, well, everyone has that. It's just that mine escalated to the point where even trying new foods was too much for me. Getting out of my comfort zone was too much for me.

Author's note:
If you or anyone that you know experience these fears, please get some medical help or talk to someone!
Remember, you are precious, and I love you.
Yeah, you. Out of all of the people that I hope are reading this, I love YOU.