Connected.

25.Getting myself together

I was devastated. I thought I really found the right person for me, but that wasn't the case.
The right person for me was always in the back of my mind, and I just had to wait for the right time to meet them.
Someone who wouldn't hurt me just because they were hurt, who wouldn't communicate with me and who wouldn't represent the past.
A week after the break up Belial called me to see how I was doing, he was sincerely worried for me.
I invited him over to my house  because my mother was at work and the last thing I wanted to do was be alone. While me and him were in the kitchen, Belial brings up a personal topic of mine. Smoking.
'How much did you smoke today? The last time I saw you smoking, you devoured three whole packs. I'm worried about you, so please tell me what's wrong!', stated Belial.
I wasn't surprised by his remark since he was always anti-smoking, and he knew about my grandma.
'I'm feeling lost. I thought Emmerson was the person for me, but I guess not. He's a fucking asshole who hurt me just because he was hurt. I protected him from that bitch, and now he turned into the bitch. I'm never helping anyone who doesn't need my help ever again. Wrong person wrong time.
If no one will love me then I'll love myself.', I expressed, frustratingly flaking the ashes of a half smoked cigarette.
'Don't say that, there are a lot of people that love you, more than I can count on my fingers! And if you don't believe me, at least know that I love you. Even though we know each other for three months, we know each other too well. It's like our souls were connected in a past life, I can't quite describe it..', Belial, stroking the back of his luscios long hair.
After returning the feelings to him, I felt this wave of peacefulness passing from his soul to mine. He was right.
This was supposed to happen.
I had found the person meant for me, a thing most people don't experience, but dream about until they pass away.
That wave made me realize how delusional I was for thinking smoking was helping me in any way, that was what Belial wanted to make me realize.
I pulled out every single cigarette I had in my house, hidden or used, every lighter that I had, I grabbed Belial's hand without any explanations, and took him outside so I could set the cigarettes and the lighter on fire.
I knew Belial felt the wave too, because he looked as happy as never.
As the cigarettes and the lighters were burning, the both of us embraced. Belial gave me a kiss on the forehead and
we peacefully watched the war I had with myself die.

Author's note:
Patience is key.