Scars

Sleeping Situations

The house was nicer than I had expected Sam to conjure up. Then again, I was partly sure he might have gotten us a place inside a cardboard box on the beach, so even this was a step up. It was on the beach, though the wind blew harder and the waves were louder here. The house was a little wooden shack with only one floor and a tiny attic space. Inside, sand and dust nearly covered everything. There was one small kitchen and a bedroom off to the side, a bathroom attached to that.

Sam stood behind me as I stood there admiring every inch of it all. I ignored the sound of rain pounding on the metal roof and the creaking of the floorboards as I shifted my weight. At this point in the day it was starting to get dark outside and cause the temperature to go down. I shivered slightly, thankful Sam didn't notice.

Sam came up beside me and filled in the silence. "Well I don't know about you, but I'm actually still hungry."

My attention turned to my stomach and I realized that I was too. "Yeah I'm surprisingly hungry too. Should we go back out or something? I mean maybe there's a place—"

Sam cut me off, "Actually, I was thinking I would cook." I stared up at him with a look of horror in my eyes. He just laughed. "It can't possibly be worse than those burgers. The bedroom is over there if you want to put your stuff down.

I nodded up at him before he took off to the kitchen and started pulling out pans, things from the freezer, and sharp looking tools. I took off to the small room quickly, not wanting to be in range of Sam using a stove.

The bedroom was even smaller once you were in it. There was a bed pushed to the wall under a wide window, spilling the light of the sunset over the bedsheets and the wooden floorboards. A dresser was at the opposite side of the room, a sad looking lamp sitting on top. I ditched my suitcase in the middle of the room and walked across the floor to inspect the bed. It was ridiculously sandy, so I decided to peel off the sheets and wipe as much as I could away.

The sand was naturally small and hard to see which meant that I just keep brushing everything off until my hand didn't feel like it was being mauled by thousands of grains of invisible horror. As I pulled the sheets back onto the bed, I suddenly realized it was the only bed in the entire house. My heart stopped for a moment before starting again faster than before. I sighed and quickly finished with the bed, backing away quickly as if it was suddenly dangerous to my health like Sam's cooking was.

I fled the room to find Sam in front of the stove. The pot he had placed on it was steaming, and I could hear the water boiling. There was a familiar smell I couldn't place. Sam looked up when I walked over. His eyebrows knitted together in concern. "Are you okay? You're really pale." He placed his hand over my forehead awkwardly and cautiously before I could speak. "Please don't tell me you're sick. You haven't even had my dinner yet," he almost whined like Ren.

I took his hand off of me. "I'm okay." I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in his shirt, as always, smelling faintly of old spice. I used the opportunity to sneak a peek inside of the pot. There, boiling in the water were yellow noodles. Ramen. He cooked me Ramen. "Oh no."

"What?" he argued, "It's perfectly...edible. It's going to literally be the best ramen you've ever had."

It wasn't. Once it had finished cooking Sam had put them into two bowls. I took mine and hopped up on the counter while Sam stood beside me, leaning into my side. The moment we both tried it, we shared a glance that said much everything. I automatically went to my phone and called in for pizza while Sam took our bowls and dumped them in the disposal.

In about an hour I was sitting cross-legged on a sandy couch with a large slice of pizza in my hand. Sam was slumped against the cushions beside me after have downed three slices already. By then, it was dark outside, the only sign of light being the occasional strike of lightning and the dim streetlamp outside the kitchen window. The rain pounded the metal roof like a lullaby. I closed my eyes and felt my racing brain slow down some. I could hear the blood thudding softly in my ears to the rhythm of the booming ocean.

I didn't open my eyes when I heard Sam get up, grab the rest of the pizza and put it away in the fridge. But I did open them when he plopped down on the couch right next to me. He grinned down at me and pecked my forehead before he slumped back against the cushion. I sat up slightly. "So, uh, there's only one bed." The question was going to come up eventually so I thought that I would just go ahead and get it out of the way.

Sam scrunched his eyebrows together, "Yeah. I know."

"So where am I sleeping?" I wasn't sure what answer I really expected.

Sam blinked, "In the bed."

"Well where are you sleeping then?"

Sam laughed through his nose and smiled. "Well, with you I assume." I had deeply dreaded that answer. Though some people might find it exciting to sleep with their significant other for the first time, I found it quite excruciating. I was not prepared for Sam to wake up with the Grinch with chronic morning breath. "Speaking of, I'm exhausted." With that, he got up and headed to the bedroom.

I sucked in a deep breath and followed him at a slower pace. He ducked into the bathroom, so I took the time to ditch my jeans for yoga shorts and ditch my raggedy tee for Sam's sweatshirt. When I was done, he was still in the bathroom, so I decided to climb into bed. I peeled back the comforter and plopped down on the spring mattress. My head seemed to sink right into the pillow. I pulled my knees to my chest and closed my eyes. I figured that if I fell asleep before he came in, I could avoid some awkward situations.

But alas, the sink water shut off and Sam walked into the room. Pretend to be asleep. Pretend to be asleep. I was glad I had my back to him. I heard him pad across the wooden floor and felt the cold seep in as he picked up the edge of the sheets and slid in beside me. I felt his heat radiate over to me and I wanted desperately to curl up against him, but I restrained myself... for a moment. He put his arm over my waist and a sort of instinct took over. I turned to curl up beside him. Oh, God, he's shirtless. I tried not to think about it.

"Did you know you're really bad at pretending to sleep?" he whispered, sending shivers down my spine. Crap. He wrapped his arms tighter around me. Though I was glad he engulfed me in his warmth, I was suddenly regretting allowing myself to sleep in this bed with him opposed to sleeping on the couch without him.

I waited there, eyes wide open, until his breathing slowed. I listened as the pounding rain softened, the pounding ocean outside the window, and both of our heartbeats, perfectly out of sync. I waited another minute to make sure he was asleep. Then I slowly wormed my way out of his grasp. Every time, he breathed too deeply or moved, my heart and my body froze which essentially meant it took what seemed like forever to get free.

I sat beside him, satisfied that I hadn't woken him, when I realized I still had to get over his body to get off the bed. Crap. I took a deep breath and worked it through my head. I could easily jump, but I would wake him up. I scanned the bed for another option. There was the obvious option which was to climb over him, but there was a chance I would wake him then as well. That's when I realized how simple this could all be.

I smiled to myself before crawling to the foot of the bed. I looked back once to make sure he was still asleep.  Seeing that he was, I slowly swung one foot over the edge rail. I lifted the other foot as well and lifted myself over it. The floor creaked beneath me when my feet came in contact with the cold surface. I turned quickly to find Sam stirring. I held my breath, my heart pounding.

Sam rolled onto his back and continued to sleep. I let out a small sigh of relief and padded my way across the room.