Ready Or Not

Ch 11 - Flesh and Blood

** Jordyn's POV **

I was a nervous wreck waiting to hear back from the lawyer I had hired with the little bit of savings I had. It was the only way I knew to get in contact with Luke and get the ball rolling with the whole paternity bullshit. All I wanted was to talk to him. But I was told that I must first have the testing, and if it was proven that Luke was the father, they (the lawyers) would establish contact between Luke and me. I understood the logistics of it. For legal purposes, paternity had to be confirmed. But I knew 100% that it was Luke's, and though it was necessary, having to wait for the results was an annoyance.

I made it clear to my lawyer that I had no malicious intentions. I just wanted to give Luke the option of being in his child's life. I didn't want my child to resent me for not trying. Luke could take the title of the bad guy if it came down to that. But I was giving him the benefit of the doubt, hopeful that he wouldn't abandon his own flesh and blood.

I was shocked when, the day after my initial meeting with Amy, she called to tell me that Luke already did his part. She then set up an appointment for my blood to be drawn, and later that day it was a done deal.

Jodie was over the top with her support. I was grateful, but at the same time felt like she was suffocating me. I was the type of person who prefered to be alone and I was very independent. I had to deal with very loud children all day at work, so I liked to enjoy peace and quiet at home. So having her on my heels and never shutting up about the situation at hand had me wanting to pull my hair out. But she meant well, so I tolerated it.

It was so hard working all day, chasing around little kids, then going to school three to four hours a night. I was so damn sick and tired all the time. But no way was I dropping out of school. I was going to break the cycle and make something of myself, unlike past generations of my birth family.

Through all of that, I had come to think of Luke as just a "normal" person. It rarely crossed my mind anymore that he was lead singer for a famous band, as I originally knew him to be. He was just a guy I had created a baby with during a moment of really hot unprotected sex, and we were going to have to figure out a lot of shit.

He had been so nice to me that night. But I worried that it was all just an act to get me in his bed. He seemed genuine, but I never was the world's greatest judge of character.

And that was another thing. I couldn't allow myself to think of him that way anymore. Sure, we'd been intimate once, but I wasn't naive enough to think it would ever happen again. It was a miracle it ever happened in the first place. I'm positive Luke had zero intentions of that experience being anything other than a one night stand. He hadn't even asked for my number and didn't seem too upset when I had to leave. So, even though I felt we had possibly made some kind of connection, I had to lock away any thoughts of possibly building on that night. I was dealing with enough, and there was no need in getting my heart broken on top of everything else.

It only took three days before I got another call from Amy. She confirmed what I already knew. But my heart still still flipped in my chest, because then I had to plan my next move.

We talked about the other issues that needed to be settled: Child support, a custody agreement, visitation arrangements, and some other things I can't even remember. At that moment, I didn't care about any of those things. I really just wanted to know if Luke even wanted to deal with any of it to begin with. Well, no one would want to deal with an unplanned pregnancy, but it was happening no matter what, and I needed to know how involved he wanted to be, if at all. And I told Amy this.

I simply wanted him to hear it from my own mouth that I wasn't going to force anything on him. I asked if it was possible to contact him through email, by phone, whatever, I didn't care how.

I heard her typing away on a keyboard, and she said that she was sending Luke's lawyer my contact information. She asked him to forward it to Luke and see if he would be willing to speak with me. So, once again, I was waiting.