Dearest - truly flung out of space

07 - Is this real?

I wake up with incredible back pain. Amelia had always complaint about my sofa but I never believed her, thinking that she just wants to sleep in my bed. But she was right. The sofa is incredibly uncomfortable and hard.

It's 7 AM and I get up to take a morning shower. After that, I quickly put on my headphones, play some music and brew some coffee for Carol and prepare some sandwiches. After 10 minutes I place everything on the kitchen table.

I hear my bedroom door open and shortly after the bathroom door closes. Carol is awake. I smile to myself, not being able to fully take in the fact that she slept at my place. I make my way into my bedroom to get some clean towels. Carol's dress is neatly folded on my desk. I open the blind to let the sunlight in. When my eyes roam around the room I see that Carol also folded the bedsheets. I quickly grab the towels and make my way back into the kitchen where I am met with Carol sitting on a chair.

"Good morning Y/N," she greets me with a smile.

"Morning," I answer and grab the coffee can to pour her a cup.

"How did you sleep?" I add as I place the can on the table again. Carol smiles at me.

"Honestly? I've slept wonderfully. Your bed may be even better than my own one at home," she answers and takes a sip of her coffee. I smile at her, being glad that she slept well.

"But there was no need for you to sleep on the sofa. Your bed is so big, I was shocked. I could have scooted over and made some room for you," she says and takes a sandwich.

I don't know how to answer her. I could have never thought she would even say that. How could she have said something like this? Wasn't this a bold move?

"Ehm, my guests only deserve the best" I say and hide my red cheeks behind my big cup of hot chocolate.

We continue our breakfast in silence. I feel like neither of us knows what to say or how to start the conversation. I'm not mad about this as I have no idea what to say anyway.

Carol suddenly asks if I have classes today. I decline. Then she asks about work. I decline again. She suggests going out for lunch together but, yet again, I decline. I haven't had time to process everything and going out with her again will make my head spin even more.

Silence again.

I'm pretty sure I messed up.

"Right, I think I should get going. Harge probably already hates me for not getting home yesterday," she says and gets up from the table to get her things.

"What will you tell him?" I ask while I grab my cup and put it into the sink. Being a university student, I can't afford a dishwasher. But it's at the top of my "I-want-to-buy-stuff-list".

I feared her answer. Lying to her husband would have made everything even worse. Carol already walked on thin ice when it came to Harge and her lifestyle. If he would find out she lied to him, things would only escalate. Carol doesn't deserve this. I want her to be happy. No, I need her to be happy. I need to know that she is okay, otherwise I will go crazy.

"I'll tell him I stayed with Abby. It will be okay. I will work something out," she says but her voice has this uncertain undertone.

"Yeah..," I whisper.

Somehow it feels like the air gets tight. I feel like I can't breathe. My heart clenches at the thought of Carol leaving me. But I know she has to go. I know that I can't keep her. I've never felt this way before. I've never cared about anyone so much.

"Everything alright dear?" Carol says. Her words interrupt my thoughts.

Unable to form a word, I nod my head. But then I feel tears forming in my eyes. Carols looks concerned immediately, her blue eyes staring into my soul.

She puts her hand on my shoulder, trying to comfort me.

Her touch is careful, gentle. It's almost like she is afraid to touch me, in case I might break. I want to melt into her touch but I have to force myself not to. It takes everything to gather my willpower. But no matter how hard I fight, I can't stop the tears from running down my cheeks.

"I think it's better for you to leave now," I whisper and Carol takes her hand away. I immediately miss her touch.

She nods and takes her bag.

I walk her to the door. With every step, my heart clenches more and more. Deep down I know that I can't let her go because I will break down the minute she walks out of that door.

Carol looks at me again. Her eyes glisten. This situation doesn't leave her untouched. Somehow it makes me feel better that she is struggling too, knowing that I'm not being too dramatic.

"Goodbye dear," she whispers and walks out of my apartment. I look after her, hoping she will turn around one more time. But she doesn't.

"Carol...," I whisper, knowing that she can't hear it. I freeze in place. Minutes later I hear the front door falling into the lock.

She's gone.

I close my door, walking into my bedroom. It feels empty. The neatly folded sheets are the only sign that Carol spent the night here. My fingers grab the pillow case. Hesitantly, I pull it closer to my face, inhaling her scent. My feelings overcome me and I break down.

It feels like someone is choking me. I can't breathe. I can't see. My vision is blurry from all the crying.

Carol Aird, what have you done to me?

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(a/n): Hey sunshines, thank you so much for sticking around for this new chapter. I really hope you like it. I wanted to thank you all for your incredible kind comments. To be honest, I never thought that people would actually read this story. Your comments really motivate me and if I could, I would hug every single one of you who reads the chapters! 

Thank you so much! Have a great day and happy reading.