Dearest - truly flung out of space

21 - Making Process

"Alright Y/N, put the clutch in,"  Abby says as she puts the seatbelt on.
I look at her with a confused gaze. I have no idea how to do it.
"You put the first clutch in. Push the coupling with your left foot. Push it all the way through. Then, you put the clutch in. And then, you put your right foot on the gas and carefully push it down while you lift the left foot from the coupling. The breaks are loose, nothing can go wrong. Ready?" She explains as she puts my hand on the clutch handle and guides it to put in the first clutch.
I swallow hard as I try to follow her instructions.
The car howls and starts to jump. Shortly after, it dies.

"Shit!" I swear and Abby laughs.
"Y/N, it's okay. It needs a bit of time. You have to do it carefully and slowly. Don't force it, okay? Come on, try again," she instructs and I turn the car back on. I put the clutch and and find a balance between coupling and gas. The car starts to move forward. Abby smiles.
"Abby? Am I... Am I diving?" I ask with a shaking voice.
"Yes, you are. Now, press the coupling again. I'll put a different clutch in. Can you hear how loud the car is right now? If we put a higher clutch in, it won't be that loud again," she explains and I press the coupling down. She changes the clutch and I find a balance between the gas and the coupling.
"Wow, you're a fast learner. I'm impressed," Abby praises and I smile. I feel proud of myself that she believes in me so much.
"Right, now we stop the car. Now, how do you think you do it?" she asks and turns to me with a raised eyebrow.
"I don't think slamming the breaks is a good idea, is it?" I answer and chuckle nervously. Abby laughs and nods, her expression serious again.

"That was very good. You did very well for your first-ever drive," Abby says as we exit her car. She walks around the car to examine if I damaged her car in any way. I chuckle, thinking about how much she must trust me to allow me to drive her car.
"Right, let me drive you to your theoretical lesson today," she says as she gets into the driver's seat. I nod and sit down on the passenger side. Suddenly, a feeling of sadness overcomes me. I turn away from Abby and look out of the window. How would this feel if it was Carol teaching me?
"Hey, you okay?" Abby asks as we stop at a traffic light. I don't answer immediately, mainly trying to push my tears away.
"I just miss her. I mean... I'm thankful that you teach me how to drive. But... I just can't stop thinking about how it would be if Carol would teach me, you know? It would have been such an amazing opportunity for us... I'm sorry," I say, the last words being almost inaudible.
"Y/N, I get that. Trust me, she would have loved to teach you. And I know that it hurts you right now. But please believe that it also hurts Carol," Abby says, trying to comfort me. She is trying her best and I do appreciate it.

"Right, I'll pick you up in 3 hours, okay?" Abby says as she drops me off at the driving school. I nod and take my bag out of the trunk. She drives off and I take a deep breath. It's only 5 PM but it feels like at least 10 PM. I miss Carol. My phone pings, a message popping up on my phone: Carol.

Carol <3
Hello Jenny,
how are you? I hope you're doing okay. Please apologize that I'm writing at such a late hour. It's almost midnight here, and I can't sleep. My husband and I were out to dine at a fine restaurant today. He has a conference tomorrow. Maybe you'd like to call to catch up on work. MAFOUS.
See you soon x

I think about her message. "MAFOUS"? What on earth could that mean? I try to make some sense into the message but I can't find a logical explanation for her words. Could it mean something about me? It has to have a special meaning to her because she wouldn't have send that if it wouldn't mean anything to her. I put my phone away and try to think about her words even more. The teddy bear calls my eye.
"What could she mean, little friend?" I ask him and inhale the scent of her perfume.

Hours pass and I still haven't figured it out. I sigh, thinking that I will probably never figure out the meaning of these 6 letters.
I'm at driving school for my second theoretical block. I manage to learn the information relatively fast and my driving instructor is proud of me. He trusts me that I can take the exam soon. I'm very hopeful to get the license before Carol comes back.
"Y/N", are you paying attention?" my instructor suddenly asks. I look at him with a confused gaze, trying to remember the words that he could have said. Embarrassment washes over me as I realize that I wasn't paying any attention in the previous minutes. I look down and try to not let the others see my blushed face.

Abby picks me up 3 hours later.
"How was it?" she asks as she starts the car and drives off.
"Yeah yeah, it was okay. My instructor thinks I can take the theoretical exam next week and then start the driving lessons simultaneously. Do you think I'm ready too?" I ask, feeling a little uncertain about the decision.
"Of course. Y/N, I know I doubted you but you have proved capable. And whenever we drive through the woods, you are very good. I feel safe when you are driving, even with the small mistakes you make sometimes. You're really good at it. And you understand the theory quite quickly. You have great potential. You just have to believe in yourself. Imagine the look on Carol's face when you pick her up. I know it is scary but I will support you. I'm with you and I believe in you," she says as we stop at another traffic light. I sigh, feeling relieved by her answer.
"Thank you," I whisper and look out of the window. It looks nice how the world passes by, "Can I pull the window down?"
Abby looks at me with a bit of confusion but nods anyway. Soon after, I pull my window down and reach my hand out. The air is pushing against it and I start to move it in the wind, acting like it's floating.
"Do you like driving?" I ask Abby after I pulled the window back up.
"Yes, I do. It makes me feel free. I can just get into my car and drive away if I need to. I'm not forced to stay somewhere," she explains as we pull up in front of my apartment.

I thank Abby for driving me and walk up to my apartment. I change into my pajamas and hug the teddy bear Carol gave me.
"Hey, little guy. How was your day? Did you find out what Carol's message meant?" I ask as I inhale her perfume.
The room falls silent and I sigh. As the moonlight falls through the blinds, I turn on my back and stare at my ceiling.

Carol Aird, I miss you. 

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(a/n:) Hello, my lovely readers. Welcome to the next chapter. I hope you like this one. I started uni last week and I already want to quit, hihi. But no pain, no gain. 

Sarah :)