A Flower Between the Thorns: A Mafia Romance [REWRITING]

Chapter 24: Mistakes

(Not edited)

Fillip's pov:

To say light—if there was ever any left in me—had been sucked from my life would have been a severe understatement. In fact, it was darkness that engulfed me deep, trying to drown me in the endless pits of oblivion, but even the darkness could not make me forget. Ignorance is bliss, and people like me are not blessed. They are cursed. So that's how life is supposed to go on for me now. I am cursed by the memory of a lover I could not hold in my arms long enough, poisoned in my heart by her departure.

Since the week Fleur had left us, I had not spent more than the hours I sleep in, which aren't even much, inside that mansion. I had seen enough of her to now see her in every corner of the house, like a mirage dancing about the house. Truthfully, it was just tip-toeing in the corners of my brain. Toying with my sanity.

More than once, Nina would yell at me to take care of my child or just send her back to Italy; at least there she would be safer. But in both cases, she would still be lacking a father. I would tell her to stay in her business, then I would call for Christian to 'remove his sister from my room.'

She would ask me about her. Mia would ask me about Fleur, and I would not be able to answer her. Then I would not be able to look into Mia's innocent eyes, which she took from her mother. When Fleur was here, I could not think of Marie; she took up every inch of my thoughts. Now I only wonder if Fleur will ever face the same fate.

Part of me is scared and is denying it. Apart from the fact that Fleur would make me forget every worry that's been eating at me from the inside, I felt comforted by her being there with Mia and me. She would be helping me raise her. A little girl who shared her eyes with her mother without getting to know who she took them from. A girl that has been calling me dad since I could remember, but I have been anything but her father.

Fleur was there to assure me that I could indeed, even after all those years, raise this girl, but now she is not here anymore, and I am scared to even set foot on the stairs that lead to her room anymore. Even if I wanted to, I could not do it. The easier way was to stay away. To stay away from the house, my daughter and Nina. I won't have to face them then.

Today I came back home earlier than usual. Staying in one of my clubs had truly drained me. Workers are asking for my permission to do things. Women come into my office, all glamorous, with drinks in their hands when they hear Don Fillip has finally decided to come in.

Don Fillip...

Fleur never cared about it. She would make fun of my title in front of me. She had truly given up by then. To think I gave her hope in any way makes an involuntary smile stretch on my face as I think of the ocean that is her eyes.

It was 2 p.m. in the afternoon. No one was in the house, and no one should have been. Lately, I increased the security on the clubs in case Alberto decided to have a go at one of them. Luc was in one of the clubs as well, with some woman, or women. Only Leo stayed here with Nina; there was nothing here for Alberto anyway. Nothing that he knows about.

Nina came running to me, panting, before I even made it inside. Christian, who was standing next to me, got confused as well by Nina's unexpected greeting at the door.

"Fine. Fine, Nina. I will do it. I will go be a father to my daughter."

"Oh, Fillip," she said, defeat rocking her body like a strong wave, 'but you're too late."

I freeze in my place, turning back to look at her. Trying hard, I read her face, and I understood.

Oh, but I wish I hadn't.