Hogwarts oneshots

Harry Potter

WARNINGS: SH/self harm scars. Please remember that there is always someone to reach out to if you feel like you need to hurt yourself, or want to.

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The world around me seemed to crumble. Everything I loved was gone. My parents were muggles, so they didn't know shit about my life. Hell, they thought I was off at some boarding school, not at a place of magic.
My boyfriend, Cormac, broke up with me two month ago. The worst part was he left me to be with one of my close friends, Katie.
My friends all ditched me to hang out with Cormac, saying that he was funnier and sweeter than I could ever be. What amazing friends they are.
I should be over Cormac, and I have to admit, I almost am, because I've developed a crush on a boy in my year, but he's not any boy I see in classes. He's Harry Potter. He sits next to me in all the classes we have together. Initially, I think it was because Hermione wasn't in those classes, and a Ravenclaw was his next best option for answers. We have become closer, I guess, but not close enough to walk to classes together, or hang out in a way except for studying.
There was no way I knew to take my anger out but this.
My dorm mate was staying with her girlfriend for the night, so i had the room to myself.
I let my body slide down the wall behind me, as I rolled up my sleeve. My eyes observed the dashes scattered over my wrist and up my arm. Some of them were healed, others were white, and some were barely visible.
I took a deep breath as i head the blade to my skin, pressing deep and dragging it across, leaving a white line behind it that soon filled with blood. I did it again and again and again, the blood dripping onto the towel I had under it. With my good arm, I placed the blade down and grabbed my wand, whispering a spell to wrap bandages around my arm.

It feels weird doing things so normal knowing what I did last night. Knowing that my arm is most likely still dripping blood onto the white bandages around my wrist. Knowing that the boy next to me, the boy I love, is completely oblivious to the fact that my arm is stinging. I kept a blank face, trying to keep my eyes open as I continued to listen to Snape's boring lecture on what will happen if you add purple slugs to potions rather than lavender ones. At some point, I tuned him out. All i could think about was Katie's giggling a few tables behind me. I could picture her touching Cormac's arm, his hand on her thigh. I couldn't help but feel alone.
"Y/n" My mind seemed to snap back to reality at the sound of his voice saying my name. I turned to face Harry, and hummed in response. "Are you alright? I noticed you were a little zoned out."
I nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." He accepted the fib, grabbing the textbook in front of us and flipping to a page in the book. He started to grab materials, placing them in a line before looking over at me.
"Could you grab that?" He asked, motioning to a bottle that he would have to reach across me to get. I nodded, reaching for it with my bad arm, handing it to him.

~ HARRY'S POV ~

She reached for the bottle, the sleeve to her robe rising a little. I could see something white under it. It's too hot for it to be a long sleeve shirt, and it didn't look like a bracelet. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion, which I quickly wiped from my face as she turned back to me. She handed me the bottle, giving me a smile.
"Thanks." I muttered. She looked over her shoulder for a second, turning back to face me again. I looked in the same direction to see Katie and her ex boyfriend, Cormac, holding hands above the table, and him whispering things into her ear. Ew.
I looked back at Y/n, seeing as she was now pouring a drop of something into the cauldron, and again I noticed her sleeve rise slightly, but just a little more than last time. She quickly pushed it down. I could tell this time by the material what it was. Bandages.
Why would she have bandages on her arm?
I don't want to ask her now, and if I'm right, I don't want to ask her in a public place.
Why would a beautiful girl like Y/n do that to herself?

~ Y/N'S POV ~

I closed my dorm door behind me, feeling exhausted. I plan on skipping dinner, coming right back up to my dorm after last class. Why would I go to dinner anyways? I don't want to see Katie snogging Cormac more than I already have to. It's fucking annoying, and gross.
I sat on my bed, seeing as the one next to mine was again neat, meaning that Meg was again staying with her girlfriend. She always comes back to the dorm in the hour between last class, flops down on her bed, and says she's going to start her homework, but never does. I usually do mine in study hall since the classes I have during the beginning of the day always give homework, and the ones at the end of the day never tend to unless there was a text coming up.
I rid myself of my robe, staring at the white covering my arm. I chose not to change it, not feeling like looking at them right now.
I laid back on my bed, holding my head in my hands as I couldn't help but feel my eyes water. What the fuck am I doing with my life? I want to end it so bad, but I can't. I can't because then there would be no Harry. No trying not to laugh in Snape's class while he made jokes, and no more butterflies when his hand touches mine, or when he placed a hand on my shoulder while laughing.
Tears began to run down my face as I covered my mouth with my hand, trying to keep quiet incase someone walked by my dorm door. I didn't want anyone in my dorm right now.
Almost on cue, someone knocked on my door. I cleared my throat, and in the most steady voice I could muster I replied, "Who is it?"
"It's Harry, your friend, Meg I believe, let me in." He paused. "Can I come in?"
I got up from my bed, put my robe back on, and checked the mirror to make sure my eyes weren't red. Luckily, they weren't, but still looked a little glossy.
I opened the door, revealing Harry, still in his uniform, but his robe wasn't with him. "What's up?" I asked.
"Can we talk. It's a little serious." He spoke with a sincere tone, making my heart best faster. My mind started to spiral with the worst ideas.
Maybe he found out I like him, and wants me to stop talking to him, or maybe he wants to move seats. How would be find out, though? I haven't told anyone? Oh god, if he knows, how many other people do?
"Okay," I moved to let him in, going to sit back down on my bed. He sat on the edge of my bed, looking into my eyes.
"I have no idea how to say this, so I'm going to spit it out." He paused to take a breath. "Your sleeve rolled up in potions. I saw your bandages, and I wanted to ask, are you hurting yourself?" He paused again. "Please be honest with me, I'm not going to think of you any differently, I just want to help. I care about you, Y/n. I care about you a lot."
Oh my god. What the fuck do i do? This is much worse than him never wanting to talk to me again. I can't say yes! I don't want him to see it.
"Harry, I'm not hurting myself. I just got a scratch in Hagrid's class, and he bandaged it up. Nothing to worry about." I looked into his eyes, searching for any signs of doubt, but all I could find was worry.
"Can I see the scratch?" He asked.
"Excuse me?" I replied, mind again searching for an excuse.
"Can I see the scratch." He repeated.
"Hagrid said I shouldn't take the bandage off-"
"I can put a new one on after." He cut me off. At this point, I knew I was stuck. I can't find a way around it. He knows, and he knows I'm lying.
Instead of keeping my composure, I did the most pathetic thing, and starting crying. I hid my face in my hands, feeling my body move as two strong arms wrapped around me. My side was pressed onto Harry's front, and I could feel his body shake ever so slightly. He was crying too.
He didn't say anything, he just held me into his shirt and let me spill my tears onto his shirt.
As my body stopped shaking and my tears began to flow slower, Harry lifted my head from his chest, holding my hands in his own.
"Can I ask why you do it." His voice was smooth and calm. He was perfect. Why does he care enough to help someone like me? Someone he can't fix.
"Why are you here?" I blurted out, my voice quieter than I hoped it would be.
"Because I care about you." He responded.
"Why?" I asked again. "Why do you care. You hardly know me."
"I care because I do know you, Y/n. I know that when you get nervous you twirl your feather around, and whenever you smile, the dimple on your left cheek shows up more than the one on your right. I know that you pretend your sad over Cormac, but that's not just it. You love the color green, because it's the color of nature when it's golden and most alive, and how you get up early enough to watch the sunrise, then go back to sleep, and stay up late enough to see the sunset. Your not the only one who stares, Y/n." My eyes were a little wide at his confession. "I care because I can't live in a world where I know your hurting. I can't live in a world where the person I care for so deeply hurts themselves." He trailed off, and his words stuck in my head like glue. "I love you, Y/n."
I tried to open my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. "It's alright if you don't like me back, I don't want to rush you into anything. Take your time, but for now, please let me help you."
I nodded, following him as he went into the bathroom in my dorm. He flipped on the light, than picked me up and placed me on the counter. He took my robe off my arms, hanging it up on the door handle. "Can I take this off now?" He asked, voice quiet. I nodded.
He started to undo the bandage, and as he continue to take them off, small spots of red started to become visible. My breath became uneven as the spots became patches, then a puddle of red.
Once he got the bandage off, I could feel the cold air on my arm. His eyes were wide, and I tried to hide my arm from him. "How long have you been doing this?" His eyes began to water.
"Since last year." I replied, shame in my voice.
Tears fell down his face at the sight in front of him. "You've been hurting that long, and I didn't do anything about it." He covered his mouth with one hand. "I'm so sorry, Y/n."
"It's not your fault, Harry. You didn't know." He quickly wiped his tears away.
"But I should've been able to tell. Fuck, I'm blind." He continued. He quickly regained his composure, moving my wrist to the sink and running cold water over it. My arm stung slightly, but I kept a straight face, not wanting him to know that it hurt.
He dried them softly with a towel, but before he bandaged my wrist again, I felt his lips on my arm. He kissed my wrist so slightly, I hardly felt him. He moved a little, then did it again, and again, and again. He kissed up my arm to where the row of my most recent cuts ended, then he whispered the spell that yet again covered my arm in white.
"How about we go get some dinner." He said, voice still a little shaky. "If you want, you can sit with Hermione, Ron, and I. They won't mind, and I would love to talk to you more about something happier."
I nodded, hopping off the counter and grabbing my robe, placing it back on.
Before we walked out of the door, I stopped.
"Harry." I said. He turned to face me. "I love you too."