The Sky Under The Sea. {Sequel To Lead Me Out Of The Dark.}

Chapter 34:Can You Feel My Heart?

Austin's P.O.V:

Things have been really stressful lately. Zundra was in a lot of pain, Robert's birthday was in a day, Alan and his girlfriend were never here on the bus anymore, Phil was home sick, Tino and Aaron drink a lot. Not to mention there was a fight the other day between Mike and David, Mike knocked out David. Its brutal, this whole tour. I want it to end.

"Austin, can you get me some water please?" I hear Zundra call out from the bunk. I sigh and get up. I don't know how much I can handle. I grab a water bottle for Zundra and head to the bunk area to give her water. "Here." I mumble. I go to walk away but she grabs my wrist and pulls me back."You've been acting weird lately, what's wrong?" She asks as she looks me in the eyes. I fake a smile and kiss her. "Nothing, just worried about you." Lies, I know I should tell her, I shouldn't let this eat me, but it will only bring her stress. She nods her head, not totally convinced. "I'm going to see where Alan is, we have a show soon." I say to Zundra, just to keep her from nagging. She smiles and nods. "I'll call you if I need anything." She says as she leans over and kisses me.

I just walked around the venue, trying to clear my head from everything. When I hear screaming.

"You're an idiot Alan."

"Why can't we just go back to the bus?"

"Go ahead Alan, I don't care anymore, why should you care?"

"I care because you're pregnant with my kid Savannah."

Maybe that's why they haven't been on the bus lately? because all they do is argue? I try to sneak past them but Alan catches me and stops screaming. "Hey." He says to me. I can see the tears in his eyes. I just walk over and hug him. "Alan, you guys need time apart." I whisper to him. I feel him nod but when I look up to see Savannah, she's gone. Alan pulls away and does the same, except his reaction was not what I expected. He just shrugs. "I give up, I don't know what's going to make her happy anymore." He says through tears. "Alan, don't cry, you're stronger than that." I reach out to give him a hug but he steps back and shakes his head. "I need to think, I'll talk to you later." Before I can even respond, he leaves.

I decided to go back to the bus in hopes of seeing Alan but I find Savannah packing her bags. "Savannah don't do this to him." I hear Zundra say. "You don't know what I'm going through Zundra, I'm sorry, I love him but I can't be here." I sigh and walk towards them. "Savannah, promise me you wont leave Alan? He loves you." I say. She looks up at me and nods. "I promise Austin, just tell him that I'll be waiting for him when tour ends. I just can't be here right now." I nod in understanding, because frankly, I don't want to be here either. She gives me a sad smile before grabbing her bags and leaving.

After she left, I kind of just stood there for a few minutes, thinking, would Zundra react like that if I left? "Austin, what's wrong?" I turn my attention to Zundra who's just standing in front of me. I shrug and take a deep breath. "I'm just stoned, I ran into Mike." I don't know why I keep lying to her, I'm not even close to high, I'm close to breaking. She giggles and playfully pushes me. "Get out." She squeals. I laugh and wrap my arms around her waist. "I love you." I whisper into her ear. "I love you more." She says as she gets on her toes and kisses me.

Zundra went to bed early, so I decided to go out and hangout with some of the guys considering we had a day off before having to spend two days on the road. "Yo pass over the joint." I heard Mike shout. I snap out of my daze and look up. I look at my hand and notice that I have the joint. I take a puff before passing it over to Alex. "If Alicia asks, I wasn't smoking." Alex says as he passes the joint over to Jaime. Jaime laughs loudly and shakes his head. "She's going to find out. " I laugh along with them, but I stop quickly as I see Alan run by. Fuck. I get up and run towards him, I'm careful though, I avoid going near the bonfire. "Alan." I call out hoping he will stop. No use. I pick up my speed, getting closer to Alan second by second. I reach my hand out and grab his arm. I come to a stop, making Alan stop as well.

"What?" He shouts. He's looking around, avoiding my gaze. I can see his eyes clear as day, they're red and puffy. "Alan, she needs time, she'll be there after tours done." I say slowly. He looks at me and pulls his arm away from my grip. "Stay away from me!" He yells. He runs in the other direction and before you know it, he's out of sight. I slide down the bus and sit on the ground. "What else is going to happen?" I mumble to myself. "Well I could get in another fight?" I look up to see David. I chuckle a bit and notice his black eye. "How's your eye feeling?" I ask him. He shrugs, "How are you feeling?" He asks as he sits down beside me. I shrug like he did earlier. "Nah, none of that dude, tell me." David says as he nudges me.

I gave in after a few minutes. I tell him all my thoughts, and just let all my emotions out. "Dude, you just have to relax, get high more often. Tour is stressful, especially when you have a kid and another one on the way. Talk to Zundra about all your emotions and stuff, she can help you. Trust me. I'm sorry if i didn't help, I'm a bit drunk." He laughs and gets up. "It's okay, It just feels good to vent to somebody, thanks." I put out my hand and he helps me up. "I got to go, Kyle wanted to watch some movie so I better go and watch it or else I wont be able to pick a movie next time." I laugh and nod. "Take care." I call out as he walks towards his bus.

After standing there for what seemed like hours, I headed back towards the bus, I think its time to come clean. I need to tell Zundra, I can't keep it in forever, it'll just kill me. I sigh and keep my head down. What about tomorrow? We wont be able to do much for Robert's first birthday because we're going to be on the road. I run my hand through my hair and just let the built up tears fall freely. I was sick of holding back everything, I didn't care anymore. I just needed to get everything off my chest and that's exactly what I'm going to do.

Sorry I haven't updated, I don't have internet connection, I get it every so often. I'm so sorry.